A Post For The Stalker
Dear Crazy Blog Stalker,
Geez buddy (please be a buddy and not a buddette) you have seen my frickin eyeball and that's it. Trust me, not on my best day in my best skinny jeans (which now live in the very, very, very back of my closet cause they no longer fit my fat bohiney) I do NOT resemble Barbie or any of the other strange females you have compared me to. But just to reassure you I am breaking my rule of anonymity and posting one pic taken by my daughter. Here you go...sleazeball. Ain't I a peach??
Geez buddy (please be a buddy and not a buddette) you have seen my frickin eyeball and that's it. Trust me, not on my best day in my best skinny jeans (which now live in the very, very, very back of my closet cause they no longer fit my fat bohiney) I do NOT resemble Barbie or any of the other strange females you have compared me to. But just to reassure you I am breaking my rule of anonymity and posting one pic taken by my daughter. Here you go...sleazeball. Ain't I a peach??
I have a question for any bloggers out there who might be reading. Do you ever get strange emails?? Really, really strange emails from an oddball who reads your blog? Today, I am thankful for anonymity. Although I realize some of you know me I doubt seriously any of you are responsible for the weird series of emails some strange pervert has been sending me. I am thankful I set up an email account just for this blog...and if you are the perv who's been emailing me...I'm not checking the account anymore...so knock it off and go pick on someone else.
I could understand if I wrote smutty or even remotely appealing blog posts...but I have read my blog...ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. Sometimes it bores even me. This dude (please be a dude and not a dudette) is just whacked. He finds smut in the most ridiculous phrasing. I had actually considered a post that was...for me...a bit out there...it was all about...well, I have seen it called...nevermind...I just can't go there. It weirds me out. Now I am thankful I refrained. I also considered copying and pasting his/her/its emails here for you guys to read...but I just can't. They creep me out. So you'll just have to take my word for it.
I installed this counter thingy (again, I am not techno literate and obviously not blog literate) that tells me where people who read the blog are. That little counter is very cool...did you know someone from Pakistan, someone from Germany, and several someones from Canada have seen this blog? No words for that...okay, I lied. I have words for everything. Obviously I am not the only person addicted to reading the random crap from people's everyday life. Oh man...I am a stalker too...but at least I don't send crazy emails. Be thankful.
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I'm disturbed by this: I may lose sleep. That's just wrong. So, Mr/Ms Stalker ... please stop.
I can't afford to lose sleep because I cannot consume any more caffeine without my heart just jumping out of my chest.
So please.
Stop.
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