Chocolate, Coffee, Sleep...the Essentials of Life!

I.Hate.Cancer

2011-02-20T18:44:00.000-08:00

My dad turns 78 on his next birthday. He has lived a life full of faith and has always looked to the end goal...Heaven. I have never heard my dad utter a curse word...seriously...never. I remember vividly the one time I heard the word 'heck' come out of his mouth. I almost fell out of my chair. He never (and I mean NEVER) speaks an unkind word about anyone...no matter what they have done. He doesn't smoke...he doesn't drink...he exercises...he tithes...he cared for my precious mom until the day she died...they just don't make them like my dad. I am so blessed. But apparently there are some things that living a life of goodness don't exempt you from.

My sweet dad has been diagnosed with cancer...I hate that word.

Super Glue...Nails...Confession

2011-02-12T17:45:00.000-08:00

Okay, I confess. I am addicted to nails. Not the hammer type...the finger nail type. I specifically like the type you glue on...yes, really. Since my lupus diagnosis my nails have become an object of annoyance. My nails no longer grow much and when they do grow they are strangely shaped and very thin. I asked the doctor and she just shrugged and said...can't help you.

She couldn't help me but CVS could. They sell the glue-on manicure of my dreams. Why don't I get acrylics? Because they HURT. I refuse to suffer torture for nails. The only problem with the glue-on variety...the glue...that stuff is seriously sticky! Today I glued my fingertip to the keyboard. So much for the 'f' key...pulled that sucker right off and then pulled off the skin on my finger trying to the get the 'f' key off!

I suppose it's better than the last time I did my nails...I glued my hand to my hair...don't ask.

The Dance

2011-02-12T15:55:00.001-08:00

Sweet DQ came home from school Monday talking about 'the big dance' that was scheduled for Friday. I remember dances in school...mostly because I wasn't allowed to go...except for the ones I went to on the sly...instead of being at a friend's house like I told my parents...okay, my behavior as a kid is a WHOLE nother story. Anyway, they were dances...you know...music, dim lighting, decorations, dancing. Middle school dances today are a different breed of function. There is a dancing room...if you call that music and dancing. There is also a game room (gym) for basketball, screaming, tag and general rowdiness.

So DQ talks about the dance all week. She buys the wrist band, makes plans to meet friends, convinces her dad to volunteer (I did my time last semester...really...once per year is enough). She comes home Friday and this is the conversation we had:

Me: So, what do you want to wear tonight to the dance?

DQ: With a look of complete disdain...uh, I'm wearing what I have on.

Me: You mean the t-shirt and ratty jeans you wore to school??

DQ: Mom, it's just a dance...NO ONE dresses up. You think I want to look cute??

Me: Well, could you at least brush your hair?

DQ: No...Mom when will you understand that the girly stuff just isn't me?

Since when is brushing your hair girly? Since when are t-shirts and ratty jeans appropriate attire for a dance? What is this world coming to?

Trapped

2011-02-03T13:01:00.001-08:00

We are prisoners in our own home. This area is just not equipped for snow and single-digit temperatures. This mom is not equipped for three days straight, cooped in the house, with my ENTIRE family. The kids stayed home from school Monday because they were sick...now they are well...and I can't get rid of them!

So I sent them outside to play...forgetting that would mean a HUGE indoor mess...snow all over the floor, wet clothing, frozen hands...you get the picture.

AND today makes DAY 4...sheesh...

So...let's talk homework

2010-09-25T19:37:00.000-07:00

40 b00ks...That's how many DQ has to read this school year. She can't just read them. She has to do a project for each as PROOF that she read them. 40 b00ks. That is more than one per week. It is almost October...she's managed to read one. Okay, correction, WE have managed to read one. I'm not sure what happens in her head when she reads silently...but I can tell you...it's not reading. She remembers nothing of what she reads unless we do it orally. 40 books...I wonder how many she has to read to pass...what do you think...30?

On top of the books...that we are...trying to read...she has MATH homework almost daily. Clearly I slept through my math classes cause I have NO clue how to help her most of the time. Which is okay since she doesn't want MY help...only her dad's. I am chopped liver these days...is that a requirement of being a pre-teen...being rude to your mother? Okay, okay, she's not actually rude...she just doesn't believe I know anything about...well...anything. Bless her.

In addition to the 40 b00ks...and the math...she has to practice...her clarinet every night. Have you ever heard a beginning clarinet player? Yeah, think dying duck squawk...that's the sound reverberating through my home each and every day. She hates math, hates reading but LOVES the clarinet...go figure.

And on top of all of DQ's homework I still have my own. Why the HECK did I think being in grad school for four years was a good idea? I should have stopped after the first master's degree...really...I am SICK of homework.

Blog, blog, blog

2010-09-12T15:55:00.000-07:00

I've lost the ability to blog. I don't know what's happened but every time I sit down with something to say, I talk myself out of saying it. But I'm working on it...sort of...

Today's good note -

DQ has eyebrows again! She would croak if she knew I wrote that but since this is technically anonymous and no one reads it anyway...there it is. Her eyebrows and eyelashes are growing back. Bless her pediatrician for the med change. Bless the darn bully for living in another attendance zone and going to another middle school. And bless DQ for growing up a bit and learning some coping skills.

the not so good -

Today I'm sick of lupus. I hate being tired and achy. I hate my darn liver because now I can't eat anything worth eating...although...it has led to weight loss so maybe it's not all bad. For the first time I wonder if this lupus business is going to impact the rest of my life...I'm thinking it might. No chocolate, no alcohol, no ice cream, no high fat anything, no spice anything...what the heck is left? (Yeah, yeah, I'm happy it's lupus and not something worse. I'm thankful I can eat at all...just saying.)

and the blegh -

Tomorrow's my birthday, I'm officially old...as if I wasn't old today... While I am busy aging, the Stepford Sister is busy doing triathlons...seriously. I'm thinking there is something really, really wrong with this picture. But I am choosing to ignore it.

I'm Looking For a Money Tree

2010-08-28T16:17:00.000-07:00

I apparently chose the wrong profession for my lifestyle. Now, before you start thinking I have some kind of champagne taste...that couldn't be further from the truth. I simply have too darn many thinks breaking and/or growing these days!

First, we had the invasion of the carpenter ants. Those suckers do a ton of damage...we caught them in time...maybe. We did make repairs...ourselves...in the rain...okay, that's a story for another day. I will say I screamed like a girl when I pulled off the window sill and saw an entire nest of ants scurrying around. Disgusting, really.

Then we had the garage door fiasco. Who knew a garage door could split right down the middle. And of course we have the giant door...not the little ones. New ones do not come cheap and no one sells used ones...unfortunately.

I won't even go into detail about the emergency room visit...from H%$^. Let's just say it was a pricey visit. And not one I plan to repeat ever in my lifetime.

DQ decided to hit a growth spurt this summer. I am truly thankful she is growing...and so is she. But she grew two sizes in three months! Nothing she owns fits so she is getting a whole new wardrobe...a few pieces at a time.

So today, my car window goes down...and will not come back up. Okay, is my karma bad? Did I do something really bad and this is payback? Yeah, I know, it's just my darn luck. So the Nissan house is happy to fix my window...which has a bum motor...who knew my window had its' own motor. Of course they have to order parts...and take the door apart...and...and...

So, if you've seen a money tree lately. Send some seeds my way! Thanks.

Gadget Sunday

2010-08-08T08:07:00.000-07:00

I'm investing in this gadget. I have been in my new office less than a week and already my things have been moved. Not having a door is going to be a problem.

GUARD DOG - to your desktop! - NEW

Motion activated GUARD DOG! Defend your desk!

Give unwanted visitors a shock - the GUARD DOG growls menacingly at anyone who gets too close. The motion sensor alerts your Guard Dog to intruders - his bark is just as bad as his bite!

Operates on either USB or battery power.

COOL CHRISTMAS GIFT 2008!

Requires 3 x AA Batteries (included).

Time of delivery:

Delivery-time with FedEx Express is 2-4 business days

Price: USD $79.00

The Office

2010-08-05T16:30:00.000-07:00

Or maybe I should say "my office". It's a bit of stretch finding it but I am unpacked and settled...sort of. My new job has landed me an interesting little space in the administration building. Interesting would be the key word. I have a door way...no door. I have a phone, not mine and not programmed with my extension. I did get a call today...but it wasn't for me, it was for the phone's prior owner. Couldn't help the caller. I have no clue who she was calling.

I don't have a computer, but I might have one by September, which will be about the time my phone is correctly programmed with my extension. I could work from home...I have doors there.

So, no door to my office. That is going to create some interesting dilemmas. I walked in to work today and a woman who works in a nearby office offered this, "I was looking through your things. You don't mind do you? Your kids have grown so much! Your desk chair is a lot more comfortable than mine, care to trade?" Guess I won't be leaving any work out on my desk...or...in my desk...or, hmmm wonder what is considered off limits in my office without a door? Filing cabinet? Book case?

I also got a parking thingy today. Clearly blonde is the appropriate color for me. The ad building has been in this location for...several years. I've had reason to visit more than once. The parking around the building is timed and patrolled by a ruthless traffic cop. Do NOT exceed the 2 hour limit. I always wondered where the administrators parked...hello, there's a parking garage on top of the building. Who knew? Okay, maybe the drive in area was a give away for some...not me. Anyway, I now have a little card to wave at the gate gadget and my very own, assigned (key word here) parking space. I was told not to divulge my space number to others. Apparently, someone who knew someone retired and I inherited their space...bless them for being in the know. My space is DIRECTLY ACROSS from the elevator. Prime real estate apparently. Unfortunately, it is also by a large steel barrier. Have I ever mentioned my lack of distance vision? I can't gauge how far away something is. The dude who parks beside me...nice white truck. Could be a problem.

I also have a key to the building...not sure I am responsible enough to be trusted with this key. They obviously did not check with my previous supervisor (or they would know that I have lost 4 keys in the last two years...I did find two of them...much, much later) or they would not be giving me a key.

I think I am looking forward to this new job...good thing I have this blog to remind me I said that next month.

(Love spellcheck. I misspelled hmmm and blonde. Hmmm, I get, but blonde? I like it with an e...sue me.)

He Found Us!

2010-08-04T18:17:00.000-07:00

Facebook has pros and cons and I am not one to spend a ton of time there. But recently I became so thankful for this crazy technological invention. DQ'a birthdad found me...on facebook. We haven't moved since the adoption (12 years ago) and we faithfully send him letters, pictures, etc. via the agency but we have had no contact with him since DQ was about a year old.

I have wondered where he was and how he was. I have prayed for his safety over the years and prayed that he would find peace with his decision. I have prayed that DQ would some day know this man she so resembles. And then suddenly...there he was...on facebook...friending me!

We have since exchanged emails and pictures. He has never married, never had any other children and yet seems to be content with his life and in a good place. He still looks just exactly like DQ. That's the very first thing she said when she saw his picture. He is open to contact with DQ...including texts...okay, I tried to warn him...DQ is a texting fiend!

I sleep better knowing he is okay and that he knows she is okay. I want him to know what a marvelous child he created and she so wants to know him. Funny, I once thought I wanted DQ to only know us as her parents. That lasted until we drove out of the parking lot the day the papers were signed. I knew as we drove away that she would need all of her family and that WE would need all of her family. Now, she has that. What a blessing.

An Office?? Oh My!

2010-07-12T16:44:00.000-07:00

Moving out of the classroom seemed like a wonderful idea. No more lunch with kids who have NO table manners. No more taking squirmy kids to the bathroom and trying to keep them quiet in the hall. No more poop in my playdough...okay, yeah, that is reason enough to leave the classroom! But now that I have an office (complete with boxes that someone needs to unpack) it seems a little scary. What the heck am I doing?

Interview

2010-05-20T18:50:00.000-07:00

It was...interesting. 52 applicants, 12 interviewed. I feel blessed to be one of the 12 considering. Now we wait...but not for long. Hiring will be done by end of next week...

Please let it end....

2010-05-13T17:42:00.000-07:00

The school year...I'm talking about the school year...that I swear has been 978 days long...really. I keep thinking this may be the LAST time I teach so I should enjoy every single minute of it but, ya know, kids keep getting in the way of my enjoyment. And of course, I'm teaching summer school...what the heck was I thinking. (I was thinking I may be 80 before I pay off my student loans so the extra money will be nice...) whatever

No, for anyone reading this who knows me...I am NOT retiring!!! Geez people...how old do you think I am. I have had several people ask...they say, "So, you're not going to be a ________ next year? Are you - loooooooooong pause - retiring???" I am not retiring, but I am moving out of the classroom. Yay!

I may be moving for real...job interview next week...

Two Posts in One Day

2010-03-17T17:39:00.000-07:00

I think it's a record. Kind of okay though, since at the present, no one is really reading.

So I spent the day at the cancer center today. I don't have cancer, I just see a hematologist there. I go periodically for iv iron treatments which is what I was doing today.

(I took this picture to send to my friend who hates needles...ya know, just to give her the heebie jeebies...wonder if it worked?)

Usually I go in, pick the chair that has no one sitting near it, bury my head in a book or stick in my ipod headphones and zone out for the hour or so that I am there. Today the cancer center was a happening place...every chair was full except for one, in the very back corner near the window...smack between a very sweet lady and a very kind man. Both folks were in their 70's (they offered, I didn't ask...I do have a few manners) and both were getting chemo. The man had been there for FOUR hours and clearly needed to visit. I didn't really say much, mostly I nodded my head and laughed at their stories. The woman talked about her husband of 54 years and the man spoke of his son and granddaughter. The time flew today and I was sad to see them both leave before me. Having them there to visit even made the repeat sticks that it took to get my iv started easier. They both seemed to take chemo and cancer in stride. The woman said she was determined to make life as normal as possible for as long as possible. Gave me something to think about. I will be going back Friday for more iron and this time I think I'll look for a seat by someone who needs to visit.

Why Didn't I Think of That??

2010-03-17T16:47:00.000-07:00

I've just spent some time reading this blog. http://fedupwithschoollunch.blogspot.com/ I have eaten school lunches for YEARS and complained about them for YEARS. Why didn't I ever think about blogging about them? Genius!

I'm glad I don't work at her school though. Those little lunch packages look a little suspect! Interesting that she also has to use a spork. Who thought of those anyway??

Yes, really!

2010-03-01T15:45:00.000-08:00

I asked a co-worker today if she would be willing to act as a reference now that I am job hunting. The conversation went something like this...

Me: I was wondering if I could list you as a reference on my resume.

Her: Oh I would love to give you...wait a minute...a job here?

Me: No, I'm not asking to work for you, I just wanted a reference.

Her: Wait a minute...you're looking for a job now? Like for next school year???

Me: Uh, yes, that's the idea with a job hunt.

Her: NO...you have to stay in your job...who are we getting to do your job??? No, wait, yes, list me as a reference and when they call I'll tell them what a terrible job you do and what an awful person you are.

Me: Uh, yeah, never mind. Thanks anyway.

I want a new job. I'd like one where I actually get to eat lunch (without refereeing lunch time between 5 year olds) and a job where I actually get a bathroom break...is that TMI? I've been praying about this whole job thing. I really want to be where God wants me to be. It would be nice if God would give me a little phone call and let me know what his plans for me are...

Can We Talk?

2010-02-27T16:38:00.000-08:00

I did something today that I never dreamed I would do...I drew my daughter eyebrows with my brown eyeshadow. It has been a tough year and one look at DQ will prove it to you. She has spent the last several weeks at school pulling out her eyelashes and eyebrows. My heart just breaks when I look at her. Today was picture day for her volleyball team. She cried when she looked at her face in the mirror. I did the only thing I could think of...I drew her eyebrows on with makeup. They looked surprisingly realistic and her glasses helped disguise the fact that she has no eyelashes. We have talked and talked and talked about ways to help her stop. She doesn't pull on either at home, only at school. Summer cannot come soon enough. I am hopeful they will grow back and life will go on...I realize that may not happen. For now I am praying that it does.

DQ is a really good kid...she needs a break.

Back again

2010-02-23T07:59:00.000-08:00

not that anyone missed me while I was gone. I am hoping my long delay will mean that I can go back to posting anonymously. Someone clued in a few too many people that I know about this blog and people started questioning my comments TO MY FACE. Yeah, I hate that. So I took a vacation in hopes those people would get on with their lives and forget that I have a blog where I am entitled to have opinions. Enough, already.

I have missed writing about junk that bugs me. So...what to talk about today. Let's start with our new dog. I never wanted the first dog...really. I am not a pet person (dogs are messy, smelly and noisy) but God saw fit to give me a daughter who is an animal lover so I'm trying to be a good parent. I swear we would have our very own menagerie (okay, took three tries to spell that right) if it was up to DQ. So I gave in and let her have A dog. Darn Dog is kind, QUIET, and well-behaved. That should have been a clue to anyone that we do not need to press our luck...but we did. A woman I work with brought her puppies TO OUR HOUSE in a basket and offered my kids their pick. (She is never to be allowed in the front door again.) She had three miniature dachshunds...two girls, one boy. My boy, picked the boy dog. He has a name...but we all (ALL of us) call him Bad Dog. He is the worst behaved, most ill mannered, LOUDEST dog I have ever seen. (My friend, the dog owner, later told me that the two girl dogs went to the same home and were BROUGHT BACK two weeks later...I didn't know there was a give back policy...it I had, Bad Dog would've been history!) This little tiny dog has chewed holes in my wall, he chewed a piece of siding three times his size off the back of the house and he eats everything in sight, edible or not. If he weren't so darn cute I would really, really hate this dog.

Odds and Ends

2010-01-03T17:39:00.000-08:00

So.........long time, no blog. No excuses other than I just didn't feel like writing but now I do. I graduated in December. Woo Hoo! I start school again in January...what the heck is up with that? Actually, I found that I really like being back in school. (Okay, the homework is not always fun and the online groups...yeah, they pretty much stink...but I like the learning part.)

We had an interesting holiday with family. My siblings and their kids are a fun bunch. We tend to make a LOT of noise when we all get together and I laugh more with them than with anyone else. I met my new Amish nephew. Okay, he's not Amish and technically he's not my nephew but in our family those technicalities don't really matter. He's a college kid and lives with my sister and her boys. Poor kid, he got sucked into the madness that is our family during the holidays. I'm not sure he realized what he was in for. But he survived so he's now official. Welcome to the family, D!

My oldest nephew won the stupid family trick of the year. He did push ups with three of his cousins piled on his back. Fairly impressive stunt...of course he is 6' 7ish'' and all muscle. He scares me a little...not really.

Two weeks spent cooped up with my children AND my spouse is plenty. I am ready to get back to work (okay, not the work part...but I am ready to be out of the house and away from my family for a bit).

No resolutions for 2010. I don't make those (at least not out loud). I do have some intentions...we'll see how they play out. Happy New Year!

Gadget Sunday...on a Saturday...in preparation for Tuesday

2009-09-05T16:57:00.001-07:00

Tuesday is just around the corner. And with Tuesday comes the start of my students. I spent the summer preparing for this moment. I am ready. Here's my new gear. I will be wearing this to protect me from any spitting, biting or vomit. Notice the arm coverings. Where were those last year when I had that biter in my room?

For those kids who prefer stomping I will be wearing these. I did consider the steel-toed version but they are just so darn heavy.

These should protect me from the screamer. There's one in every bunch, ya know! (Actually all of my kids appear to use screaming as an outlet this year.)

And if all this gear can't protect me. This year I will be investing in this. It should do a great job providing me with a safe spot to teach from.

I'll let you know how Tuesday goes if I survive. And if I can stay up long enough to type after sitting in on the stupid webinar that will hopefully explain what the heck I am supposed to do on my graduate presentation.

Can You Hear Me Now?

2009-08-13T16:10:00.000-07:00

There is apparently a problem with my English...or maybe it's my vocabulary...or maybe, just maybe the technology people in my district need to learn to LISTEN. We (my entire campus) just moved back to our newly renovated, freshly painted school. Funny, my old portable with the falling apart ceiling tiles still looks remarkably unchanged...but hey, the school looks great!

We were given strict instructions to have our computers in the location where we wanted them set up...by a certain date...or else. The tech guys were coming to our school on ONE day and ONE day only so get ready.

The internet/phone set up is an odd thing in our district. The announcements and the bell all come through the phone speaker now. AND, the phone doesn't need an electrical cord...it just plugs into the computer and the internet drop. (Internet drop...you'll be hearing that again...a few times) SO...apparently it takes a rocket scientist to connect all those pesky wires...cause ya know...us teachers...apparently are missing the appropriate brain cells to do it ourselves.

As instructed I left my computers/phone to be connected by the pros...who were apparently in a hurry the day they worked in my room. My phone...doesn't...work. So I did what I was supposed to do...I called the handy, dandy, help desk. First, I listened to a recording about how the calls were handled in the order they were received...yada, yada, yada. Then, the tech answered...HEY...when did we hire WOMEN techs?? Our conversation went something like this:

Tech: I checked with the techs and your campus is all configured. Everything works.
Me: Uh, no, my phone doesn't work.
Tech: Did you do the set up yourself?
Me: No
Tech: What do the wires look like that are coming from your phone?
Me: Internet wires? Ethernet cords?
Tech: Check your phone...see the blue wire...what is it plugged into?
Me: An internet drop.
Tech: NO, what is it plugged into? A black box?
Me: No, an internet drop...we were just renovated, remember?
Tech: Right, your phones are all configured correctly. How many plugs are on the drop?
Me: Two
Tech: Right, it's an internet drop...they all have two. (NO KIDDING!) Your phone should be working fine.
Me: K, but mine doesn't work.
Tech: Unplug the cords from your phone and look at the phone screen...what do you see?
Me: It's unplugged, it doesn't show anything.
Tech: ANSWER MY QUESTION. What do you see?
Me: Duh...I see a blank screen.
Tech: Right, the phone is unplugged. It should be blank.

At this point I am beginning to realize I am not going to be helped. The tech said she would have to "do some research" and call me back. Yep, still waiting on that call back.

Gadget Sunday...For The Crazy Parent Shopping Next To Me

2009-08-09T11:48:00.000-07:00

Wow. It's been a whole week since I posted. You'd think I was busy or something but really...I've just been swimming and sunning (yeah, yeah, keep your skin cancer comments to yourself...I'm old, I've read the research) and napping and doing homework. So I haven't been busy...just incredibly lazy. One more week and all that will change.

So in between sunning and swimming and sleeping...I did a little back to school shopping for my kids. Sheesh...all the nuts were out. I am going back to online shopping only. Is it wrong to buy your kids' school supplies online? I think not. So...shopping...nuts...crowds...oh yeah, that brings me to today's gadget. It needs to be prefaced with a story...so I don't go down in flame emails.

Some people should not have kids. Or it they have kids...they should shop online....really. I went to this neat little shop with my daughter (in between the school supply shopping...work with me...). We were looking for bead strands for a friend. It was one of those stores that caters to women who like animal prints and crosses and unusual (think ugly) handbags. It is crowded...no aisles...just a bunch of stuff everywhere you turn. And in the midst of this stuff there is a mom...with a little boy...who is screaming bloody murder. Why is he screaming?? Cause he wants to run rampant through the store. For ten minutes she let him screech...just as my teacher persona was coming out...she put him down. He promptly ran and grabbed the nearest items (bracelets) and slung them across the floor. Mom went to pick him up and he started screeching...like a banshee...and running into displays...so his mom...perfect parent that she is...said, "When you stop acting like that I will pick you up," and then proceeded to IGNORE HIM. He destroyed an entire little section of the store...the poor little teenage worker was horrified but tried so hard to be polite. DQ and I left before I could give that woman a piece of my mind.

That woman clearly needs today's gadget....I may just order it and leave it at the store for her future visits.

No Gadgets This Sunday

2009-08-02T14:04:00.000-07:00

I looked high and low for some gadget that would miraculously unpack the 30+ boxes that are still left in my classroom. Unfortunately, I found nothing. Which means tomorrow I will be back in the room, unpacking one box at a time until I make it til the last one.

At least I have an incentive tomorrow. At 1:00 I get to go have my hair color fixed...and the cost isn't going to make me faint...cause I asked ahead of time. I have lived with this scary color for the entire summer. I cannot wait to have normal hair again. No clue what I am talking about? Go here.

Summer is rapidly ending. Two more weeks and I am back at work. (Okay, actually I am back tomorrow...but I can leave anytime I want so that doesn't really count.)

My Rose-Colored Glasses Have a Crack in Them

2009-07-27T17:58:00.000-07:00

I am an optimist...almost all of the time. I see the world in a positive light and like to be around others who are the same. But today...darn it...my rosy world is a bit dreary. I have been looking for an administrative job that would take advantage of my (almost completed) master's degree. My refrigerator door is currently the home of several rejection letters. I think it's good for my kids to see that you can be rejected and the world goes on. Yeah, yeah, ENOUGH already.

Today I found out that a schmuck that I have coined the "golden boy" got a job...as an administrator. This guy is lazy, a bit nuts with his ideas, AND he doesn't have a degree in education. He is being alternatively certified (which I think is great IF you actually know something about education). He has very few years experience and it is all in the same area/grade level.

Apparently I am missing a value piece of equipment that is needed for an administrative job in this area...and I don't think I'm going to be growing this piece anytime soon. AGH!

Figure That One Out

2009-07-22T20:15:00.000-07:00

My son has four brothers...who all have other mothers...adopted mothers, that is. Flapjack is the youngest. He has three brothers who live with one family and then the oldest brother lives with another family. All the boys live in the same town and know each other. Flapjack and the brother closest in age to him...let's call him Brother #1 love to spend time together. There is a 2 year age difference but you wouldn't know it to see them together.

This summer they have spent a ton of time together at the pool and back and forth at each other's houses. They think it is hilarious to tell people they are brothers. One of them will usually say, "This is my brother with another mother" and then burst into gales of laughter. No one else gets the joke. Today at the pool they were talking to a life guard and I could see the discussion was getting heated.

I swam near them and brother #1 yells out, "Tell her we're brothers!"

So I said, "Okay, they're brothers." The lifeguard laughed and said, "Yeah, right."

I said again, "They really are brothers." Poor thing...I should have offered an explanation but honestly the look on her face was priceless. Wonder if she'll figure it out on her own? Or if she'll ask? The boys were just happy I settled the matter.

It is odd how happy it makes me feel that they have such a strong bond. Seeing them together it is clear they are more than friends. They have an unbreakable bond...that survives the fights they often have...just like normal brothers do.

Gadget Sunday...Again For the Rich and Famous

2009-07-18T19:09:00.000-07:00

For those of you looking for a new laptop...here you go.

Of course it is slow, has zero room for any program of substance and comes with nothing novel...but hey...you would look great carrying it!

Yes, I realize it is Saturday. Pretend.

Why I'm Not A Photographer

2009-07-14T19:31:00.000-07:00

I thought I might share some of my more recent pictures. Be sure to appreciate my photography skills!

This is the splash my son makes when he jumps off the high dive. I have several pictures just like this. I was trying to take my son's picture. I missed...a lot.

Okay, I almost caught him this time...almost.

This is DQ and her friends. (DQ is in front.) Any problems with this picture? Okay, the problems here are clearly not mine!

I'll just have to keep at it I guess! Practice does make perfect...right?

Gadget Sunday...Obviously I Am Not Among The Rich And Famous

2009-07-12T10:16:00.000-07:00

I am considering buying a new cell phone soon since my contract is up. I want an iphone. I don't really need one, but I want one. I've been doing a little online research to make sure I get the phone I want. I found this website.

Who knew the rich and famous had their own line of cellphones to choose from. Thousands of dollars for a cell phone? Really? Gotta say I have some issues with this.

Visiting With The Boys

2009-07-10T19:12:00.000-07:00

Actually, I'm not sure I can call them boys anymore. Stinky (the Stepford sister's youngest) and the Giant (the oldest boy) are now 17 and 18. The Giant is now a whopping 14 inches taller than me and Stinky is almost a foot taller. They are some seriously big boys. My family is visiting my dad for a few days. I wasn't sure if we would see the boys. Their mom is hanging out with her daughter at the beach so the boys are on their own. Most teenage boys would be...well...being teenage boys. My nephews are working and working out and then sleeping in their spare time. But they both managed to come over to spend time with us. Stinky even brought his girlfriend who DQ nicknamed Limpy (that's a whole other story).

So last night we did what I love most. We sat at the dining table and laughed and talked over each other and laughed and laughed some more. When my family gets together we are LOUD. We all laugh LOUD and often and we love to tell stories. My mom would have loved hearing the boys last night. They were in rare form.

I kept looking at these boys and wondering when they grew up. I am so thankful for HOW they grew up. They are great guys and we are blessed to call them family. Stinky has spent most of the day with us. We even got to see his sweet girlfriend again. I love family!

Yep, That's My Child!

2009-07-08T20:40:00.000-07:00

I have relaxed the "you have to match" rule this summer and DQ is taking full advantage. Yesterday flapjack had a swim party. The mom of the birthday boy is a friend that I work with. She now has a new view of my daughter...as well as a reminder how glad she is that she only has boys.

DQ and several friends were swimming and had to get out, dry off and change clothes quickly so I could get to the party to pick up my son on time. I didn't check to see what DQ had on because I was in a hurry. To be honest, I didn't look at her when she got in the van. BUT I sure saw her when she got OUT of the van to walk with me to get flapjack.

My daughter was wearing...cropped blue sweat pants with orange trim (yep, that's okay), a long sleeved, horribly wrinkled pink shirt that is two sizes too small (I think she pulled it from under her bed), AND to top this outfit off...she wore a leather/fur vest (cause she was...cold?) AND striped ankle boot houseshoes (they are apparently comfy). She did NOT comb her hair so it was a drippy, matted mess of long hair but she did manage to find her sunglasses (pink, with sparkles). She was a sight. Now you know why I choose her clothes for school.

I was telling my friend this story today and she laughed and asked if I saw her yesterday when she walked down to their house to play...uh no...why? Picture short shorts, tank top and knee high black boots...oh my...I am out of words.

Karma Bites Me In The Behind

2009-07-07T14:43:00.000-07:00

For years I have made fun of my husband about his need for bifocals. He would squint to read the paper and move his glasses down his nose. So he finally went this summer and got...bifocals. Be careful what you wish for. He got some kind of progressive lens thing and now, not only can he not see, he's grouchy too boot. He says his new glasses make him dizzy...I say, just don't wear them.

I decided it had been a long time (okay...maybe 15 years) since my last eye exam so maybe I should get my eyes checked as well. I have had glasses since college but I only wear them for distances. (Okay, okay, I don't wear them at all. I like the fuzzy way the world looks without them.) I have been wearing cheaters lately when I read my textbooks so I knew I would probably need a new prescription.

Apparently, I have odd eyes. Who knew? I now have two pair of glasses. One for distance and one for reading. The odd part? My distance vision pair has a left lense that is plain glass and a right lense that is prescription. The reading pair is just the opposite. I wanted one pair...with one distance lense and one reading lense...apparently that's a bad idea. So now I have two pair of glasses that I won't wear.

The best part...when I picked up my new glasses...they were different than the ones I picked out...really different. But I figure...as much as I wear them...who cares. So I kept them.

I Thought This Was A Free Country!

2009-07-06T18:42:00.000-07:00

This came out of my daughter's mouth tonight. Summertime is moving slowly these days and my daughter and I seem to push each other's buttons on a regular basis. I had to sit her down and explain that life in our family is NOT a democracy...it's a dictatorship...and she is NOT in charge.

I'm not sure I'm ready for the teenage years.

Gadget Sunday...And Other Stuff

2009-07-05T17:26:00.000-07:00

Here's a gadget appropriately named for the day after July 4th. It's also a pretty cool gadget...if you like gadgets. Check this site for a firecracker. No clue why they call it that. But the geek guy says it's cool so that's good enough for me.

We had an interesting, busy fourth. Flapjack managed to drop a sparkler BETWEEN his toes (how the heck did he do that?) and ended up with blisters on both. I gave him zippo sympathy. How smart is it to do sparklers barefoot?? Okay, I was actually sympathetic once the blisters appeared.

No fireworks in our area thanks to a storm and high winds but we had a great time with friends anyway. The kids ran crazy and the adults visited and ate watermelon. My kids even slept past 6 am this morning! Bonus!

Can My Brain Get Sunburned?

2009-07-02T16:21:00.000-07:00

I think I have spent ~~a little~~ entirely too much time in the sun. In fact, my brain may actually have sunburn. That would explain the observations I feel the need to make now that I am sitting comfortably on my couch in my nice cool house. While at the pool I noticed a few things...some women should not wear bikinis. I am one of them...and I don't own one so I am not talking about myself. If your belly hangs OVER the swimsuit bottoms...it is a sign you need a one piece...trust me.

My daughter will be wearing one of those modest, high-necked, to the knees suits when she becomes a teenager. And I will be accompanying her to the pool for the remainder of her single life. Teenage boys...girls in bikinis...WAY too much PDA's going on.

A boy, who is now on my hit list, had the audacity to call me "that ole lady"...HUH?? Okay, it might have been because I turned his behind into the lifeguard. NOT the guard wearing the hat and spitting ice...clearly he was too busy to see that this boy had just plowed over several small children giving one a bloody nose just so he could catch his stinkin football. I went all the way to the office to get the guard I actually knew would take care of the situation. Apparently this boy was offended that I would interrupt his game and felt the need to tell his buddy...the ice-spitting life guard about the "old lady" who needed to "mind her own business". Uh, kid, I was sitting right by the lifeguard stand...yep, I heard you. Guess what?? Don't care! That was my kid who got the bloody nose. You are lucky I didn't snatch your butt out of the pool myself. And my hearing still works just fine. Thanks.

Thanks to the lady who brought her cute little toddler in the swim diaper and then let her pee down her leg while standing on the edge of the pool. I really needed to know that your kid has a pee-soaked diaper in the same pool that I am currently sitting in. I think the idea is to CHANGE diapers when they are wet. Just a thought.

And finally, to the kid who kept hitting me in the head with the water ball. The first time, funny. The second time, kind of funny. The third time I wanted to stick that ball down your laughing mouth. The fourth time...well...really...there shouldn't have been a fourth time. I am really sorry your ball ended up in the women's bathroom. Hope you found someone to get it out for you.

Perhaps I should make tomorrow a "stay at home in the shade" day. My fried brain needs a rest.

My Friends Tell the Funniest Stories

2009-07-01T17:47:00.000-07:00

I went to the pool today...stayed for 5 hours...forgot to sunblock the inside of my legs...regretting it big time right now. But that's not the funny story.

My friend was telling me about her car. It's in the shop because the transmission blew...not good. So she has a cool rental van to drive until her car is repaired. She took her daughter to visit her horse today...she left the window on the van open and...

the horse ate the steering wheel!! I was laughing too hard to ask what she was doing while the horse was snacking. She spent most of the day at the insurance company (she said the insurance agent looked at her like she'd lost her mind...go figure) and then heading to the dealership to find out how much it was going to cost to buy a new steering wheel.

The guy at the dealership (after he finished laughing at her) suggested she get some glue and try to glue the foam back together and then pretend it never happened. My friend is way too honest for that. She'll be paying for a new steering wheel. Bet she doesn't leave her window open next time they visit the horse!

I Am An Internet Addict

2009-06-29T19:47:00.000-07:00

Agh! Who knew I was so addicted to the darn internet?? My modem bit the dust and the one I wanted wasn't available...so I decided to wait until it was...WHAT WAS I THINKING??

I didn't realize how much I relied on the internet. I use it for homework, blogging, facebook, bill paying, wasting time, wasting time...okay, you get the drift.

I went without internet for a WEEK. A WEEK! I thought my kids were gonna kill me. Apparently they are also addicted. We managed...and ended up...gasp...talking to each other...and...reading...shocking.

Whew...now my life is back to normal. Cause this cool guy at Best Buy informed me I could use a non-brand name modem/router and it would work just fine. He was right. Ahhh....love the internet.

Dear Dad

2009-06-21T18:28:00.000-07:00

I am stealing/borrowing/copying (take your pick) this idea from byebyepie's blog .

Dear Dad,

I might have made one or maybe two mistakes over the years that I should apologize for. So here you go...

I apologize for college...in general. That covers a lot of sins. I am particularly sorry about that time I got brought home in the back end of a police car. Embarrassing...yeah, sorry about that.

I'm sorry about the Christmas I taught sweet Nickle your real name and taught her to call you only by that name and convinced everyone in the family to write To: _____________ on the gift tags. Although I did (okay, still do) get a lot of amusement out of that little prank I realized you saw absolutely no humor in it. Notice I learned my lesson and did not put your real name on the blog...even though it's anonymous.

Sorry I quit basketball to be a cheerleader. I know you really hated that. I really hated basketball.

I am sorry I threw out your golfballs and took some of your quarters. Did you know I did that? Technically it wasn't wrong since Mom gave me permission. But we kept it to ourselves and now the guilt is getting to me. So, it was me Dad, sorry.

I have the greatest Dad on the planet. He is the calmest, kindest, wisest man I know. I am so blessed! Love ya, Dad!!

And boy, am I greatful he doesn't read my blog...cause some things are better left in the past...like the name escapade. He still does not see the humor.

Gadget Sunday...I'm Sure I Can Find A Need For This

2009-06-21T00:30:00.000-07:00

Once again my german-speaking friend came through with a gadget. I'm starting to think she trolls the internet more than I do! Thanks, friend!

I think we all need to get some of this. Nuclear grade...doesn't that sound McGyverish? And please note, it can be used outdoors...uh, yeah, I would certainly hope so!

How Do You Spell B.O.R.E.D?

2009-06-20T19:46:00.000-07:00

It's finally happened. I have become the person my friend Mary accused me of being...a couch-potatoing, internet surfing, homework slacking, horridly bored...you get the picture. I have become...THAT person. *sigh* While surfing I found the following...enjoy:

What is the longest English word? In case you don't want to look it's Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanocon. Sorry, you'll have to look if you want to know what the heck it is.

This is just wrong. What is up with the British? I memorized this rule and I still use it and now you want to do away with it?? Wrong, just wrong.

And finally there is this. This site is a little bit addicting for me. Maybe that's why my homework isn't finished. All those words...so little time.

The Kid Down the Street

2009-06-20T16:31:00.000-07:00

There's a little kid ( 5 or 6, maybe) who lives down the street. He likes to play at our house...which is fine...within reason. This little guy knocks, rings the bell, pulls on the doorknob and generally creates a ruckus until someone opens the door. He doesn't take "no, we can't play" for an answer. He needs to know why, and when and where and all the details...it kind of drives me nuts. He comes over all day, every day. Today, we were out swimming in the backyard when I hear, "HEY! You are home! I knew it! Can I swim??" This kid had scaled our back fence and was peeking over it...how the heck he did that I will never know. I said no...no reasons, no excuses, just no. Today, I just wanted to play with my kids...only my kids. Does that make me a mean neighbor? Probably. Oh well, now I can just live up to my reputation and keep saying no.

Please Pray

2009-06-17T15:07:00.000-07:00

for my friend's tiny baby who is in the hospital. Little ones should not get sick. :(

Senior Day at the Salon...and I'm Not Talking Graduates

2009-06-17T13:55:00.000-07:00

I had a disappointing day yesterday. I went to see my BFF the hair dude for my scheduled appointment only to find...he had hit the road and left no forwarding address! The very nerve of this dude. So I had to reschedule the appointment for today...with a dudette...hmmm...

When I got to the salon I realized Wednesday must be senior day...cause there were only little old ladies there. One sweet lady was getting her hair dyed BLACK...and her eyebrows dyed BLACK, too. It was a little scary to watch. I'm not sure how they planned to get that dye off her face but I assume they had a plan. She kept using a comb to scratch her head and dye would get flung everywhere. I was thankful to be sitting across the room from her. Another little lady (and I'm talking tiny) was getting her hair...I think blonde. The dye was blue...does that make hair blonde? Before they put the dye on she spent some time commenting on how it "sure felt like she was brushing more than two weeks of spray out". I had to ask...she gets her hair "done" every two weeks and shellacs it to her head. She doesn't even comb it until she comes back. Wow! Who knew you could do that?

So I did get my hair done...no more blonde. Well, still sort of blonde. I have no real clue what she did, something about lowlights and highlights and base color...I just know it somehow cost twice as much as normal and I now have bangs and hair that is...well...many different shades. DQ said she would 'have to get used to it'. My son, bless him, said it makes me look younger and he loves it. That kid's gonna be ladies man yet. My opinion is still coming...I'm not quite sure what I think...it is definitely different...think skunk stripes...all over the head. At least now I look like I should have a tattoo...actually multiple tattoos...and a few additional piercings.

My Son Is Just Like Me

2009-06-16T19:04:00.000-07:00

Sometimes it is easy to see God's hand in your life. Watching my son grow is one of those times. Flapjack may be adopted but he is in every way my kid. Here are some ways that he and I are alike:

He will read anything (including the phone book) when he is bored.
He has to read every page in every book he checks out from the library...even if he doesn't like the book.
He refuses to share food, drinks, etc with anyone including family. Don't let him catch you drinking through his straw...he will have to get a new drink.
He likes Judge Judy...a lot.
He is NEAT, as in tidy...love that!
His clothes must match...down to the socks.

Love my son!

Gadget Sunday...For The Campers Among Us

2009-06-14T09:18:00.000-07:00

I don't camp...ever. Save me from the great outdoors. It just doesn't appeal to me. My family feels differently so for them I will be investing in one (or two or three) of these . At least I won't have to worry about my kids coming home stinky!

This just happens to be my 100th post. Woohoo!

Baseball part 2

2009-06-13T19:25:00.000-07:00

Pros and Cons of spending many, many, many hours at the baseball park.

Pros (let's be positive and start here)

My kids can't be loud enough to disturb ANYONE in this environment.
Meeting new (temporary) friends from places we have never heard of who give us paper plates on paint stirrers to use as fans (or wave as if we are team fans...take your pick).
Shade...I am oh, so, thankful there was at least shade.
Having repeated foul balls hit in your general direction which guarantees you stay awake the entire time.
The kids got to wave at and cheer for their dad...much to the amusement/disgust of the surrounding fans...depending on his last call.
Reserved parking for umpires...right across the street from the gate.
Controversial calls...provided much needed entertainment. Just love hearing from mad fans...really, it makes me laugh.
It's better than doing homework.

Cons

The little ladies/men who search your bag (some better than others) to make sure you are bringing food or drinks in to the stadium. Good thing I have a giant bag that carries too much stuff to comfortably search through without invading my privacy for a stinkin baseball game.
Concession stand food...$3.50 for a water bottle?? $3.00 for a teeny, tiny, sour snocone?? The cheapest thing going was coffee...2 bucks...really...who wants coffee in 90 degree heat?
Sitting in those hard seats for 17 hours...enough said.
Being surrounded by sweaty people...does not do good things for my germophobia.
The duck call whistle...whatever...there were no ducks...I wanted to shove that whistle...never mind.
Watching an umpire...a VERY old umpire...take a fast ball to the face mask. Knocked him down and scared the kids...especially DQ. Thank goodness it was after her dad had done his time behind the plate.
Tornado evacuations to the hotel lobby...where all the umpires are hanging out...visiting...which meant I was left to deal with DQ...throwing up on the floor...in the lobby...in her pajamas (and yes, I was in my pj's too) cause she thought a tornado was going to suck her up into the sky.

I am thankful to be home. Now I can send the kids to their rooms when they get on my nerves.

Take Me Out To The Ball Game!

2009-06-11T17:44:00.000-07:00

Or maybe just take me back to the hotel cause I just spent 11...that's ELEVEN hours at the ball park. And let's just say there's lots of blogging material to be found at a ball park. More about that later. First, this would be the reason we spent ELEVEN hours at the ball park today.

That would be my husband officiating at the state baseball tournament. The kids and I tagged along for the fun. He had to be at the park for pictures (cause ya know ya gotta have your memories!) at 8:00. The first game was at 10:00...followed by one at 1:00 (he was off the game but what the heck...we were at the park anyway...why not watch it) and then another one at 4:00. There was a game at 7:00 but I had to draw the line somewhere.

Surprisingly my kids were extremely well behaved (which doesn't bode well for tomorrow...I don't think I can get two days in a row). They managed to sit...SIT...for 3 entire baseball games. Flapjack loved it and asked a kabillion questions. DQ also asked a kabillion questions but none of them had anything to do with baseball so I ignored a lot of them. (I know that sounds rude but really...she just talks...a lot...an occasional uh huh is all it takes...she's not really looking for answers most of the time.)

The fans...hmmmm...the fans...there is just nothing like a high school baseball mama. Get the heck and stay the heck outta her way. These women had their faces painted with paws and letters and all kinds of stuff. Flapjack wanted to know if I would do that when HE played at the state tournament (that's my boy...dream big!). I assured him that by that time I would be entirely too old to care about makeup and I would simply bring my bullhorn to make sure he heard my coaching advice.

DQ and I had a favorite fan...she called him Robbie Ray. He was rockin the mullet...complete with permed hair in back, cut off shirt sleeves, tattooed bands around his biceps...and he was OLD. His permed mullet was streaked with grey. He was something...not quite what he thought he was...but he was something. He yelled...a lot...especially at my husband...which cracked me up. I love listening to the fans complain. It's my personal favorite part of the game. I want to tell them my husband is a bit deaf...okay...a lot deaf. He is NOT hearing them...but if it makes them feel better to yell...more power to them. It keeps me entertained and that's what's important, right?

Tomorrow we have yet another day at the ball park. I will NOT be spending ELEVEN hours there...but maybe 5 or 6.

Today, It's Officially Summer Vacation!

2009-06-08T16:19:00.000-07:00

The sun was shining. The pool was open and we were there! Today I got to:

visit with friends while treading water during adults only swim time.
watch my son jump joyfully off the high dive over and over again.
watch my daughter flit all over the pool making friends.
smell sunscreen and be happy about it.
get a little too much sun in a few areas that haven't seen sun since last summer.
eat watermelon cold from the cooler...yum.

I love the start of summer vacation. I love hanging out at the pool with friends. I love that my kids go to sleep easily because they are exhausted from the sun and the swimming. I love having time to drink coffee and read the paper before I get dressed. I just love summer!

Gadget Sunday...I Should've Thought of This!

2009-06-07T06:46:00.000-07:00

Finally, just what I need, a way to nap when I should be...working, doing homework, listening, pick one. Wonder how many of these they actually sell?

It's a pilo pilo. Want one? Get it here!

Family Fun In The Sun

2009-06-06T19:08:00.000-07:00

Whew...the school year is finally over! We left yesterday and traveled to meet up with my sister, brother, sister-in-law and nieces to watch my nephew at the state track meet. I can sum the experience up in two words...FUN...HOT. Geez, louise, it was HOT. I'm talking sweat the minute you start walking hot. Good thing we were all family cause we were smelly by the time the night was over!

My nephew, the giant (trust me, this boy is seriously tall), threw the shot put and won third place...a medal...my nephew...I think he takes after me. (Stop that laughing!) The giant is all grown up now...graduated...real job in the sheriff's office...signed to play football in college...sigh...where does the time go?? My other nephew, smiley, is now officially a senior. Sheesh...

While at the track meet I caught up on family news. Apparently I am still out of the family loop. I'm not sure how that happens...maybe I don't listen well...nah...that can't be it. Or maybe they are keeping things from me...yeah...that's it. Or maybe I have just been too busy to call...ding, ding, that's it. Anyway, my sister-in-law, triathlon woman, is doing her first triathlon tomorrow. My family, really, the Stepford sister is a kick boxer and no one messes with her. Now my sister-in-law is a triathlete? Pardon me while I go sulk on the couch with my ice cream. But it's really okay, cause my brother, the karate kid...he's hanging in there with me and my ice cream. Thanks for your support bro!

It's rare that I get to play a prank or anything on my brother...he's the master. So this weekend I had not one, but two chances and I took them both (okay, technically the second was not a prank and it took me but anyway). While waiting in line at the DQ after the meet last night (way past my bedtime) Stepford sister and Triathlon Woman were discussing the car in front of us. It just happened to look exactly like our car. They wondered why the heck the boys weren't home yet and if it was really them. I was in the back nursing a BAD headache from too much sun and not enough food and decided some fresh air might help. So I offered to go check it out. I walked up and HAMMERED on the passenger window. Sure enough, it was them, my brother jumped and assumed the karate kid position...knee up and everything...cause that's what he does...when he's scared.

It's a wonder he didn't give me a sunroof. I laughed until I thought I was going to pee...yeah, yeah TMI. By the time we get home I am feeling really, really, really bad. Add a little carsickness to a bad headache and well, you get, well, let's just say I christened my brother's new lawn...in full view of his neighbor who probably wonders what kind of people he has living next door.

All in all it was a fun, entirely too short trip. I love my family. I am very, very lucky in that department.

I'm Over It

2009-06-03T18:38:00.000-07:00

Yep, it's Wednesday and I'm over my pity party. I knew I would be. I just can't hang on to negative stuff very long. I applied for three (well actually four) jobs today. The fourth was an accident and I'm still not sure how I did it. I found the PERFECT job doing exactly what I'm doing minus the teaching (so minus the biting, hiting, kicking) and it pays WAY more than I make now...so I filled out the application but never intended to send it...cause it's in a town more than 8 hours away!! Then I got an email tonight thanking me for my application...oops. Guess I shouldn't apply for jobs while managing a classroom of rowdy, excited kindergarteners. (No, I did not just admit to doing something other than working while at my job. You must have read that wrong.)

I think I suck at interviewing...so I intend to practice before the next one.

Please Pardon My Pity Party

2009-06-01T16:36:00.000-07:00

I promise to snap out of it tomorrow...or maybe Wednesday.

Today was blegh.

I found out I did not get the job I wanted...really, really wanted. (Yeah, please, no comments today about a better job being out there for me. I'm sulking today and I don't wanna hear it. Save it for Wednesday.)

My favorite white sandals are history thanks to a tantruming kindergartener. Well, actually, I can wear them (and did for part of the day) if I use clear packing tape to tape them to my foot. They don't look as cute with the tape...but from a distance I'm sure no one can tell. And the squishy tape noise is barely noticeable.

My pedicure...that was on week two...which is some kind of record...also history. Thanks to a different tantruming kid. I HATE painting my nails.

I have two new bruises on my stupid white legs thanks to yet another tantruming kid. Do they not understand that my stupid white legs look bad enough cause they are stupid and white???

Okay, I'm off to ice cream and a dvd on my laptop...in my room...by myself...cause I am pouty and no one wants to be around me!

Gadget Sunday...This is my kind of gadget!

2009-05-31T02:00:00.000-07:00

I'm going to be honest (gasp!) I don't like to share my stuff...especially if it's edible. I don't share my candy or my ice cream or my cookies...seriously. I have my own supply and watch for the smack if you touch it. My kids learned this lesson early. Just ask them. (Yeah, yeah, shut up...how many of you hide your treats?) So these little handy, dandy gadgets are just what the doctor ordered!

There's this one. (Try to ignore the dreadful cookie cutter at the top of the page...if it's still there.) Where has this been all my life? No more kids asking to share...they want the cookies but they don't want mom germs (which are apparently some kind of deadly virus carrying germs). I'll be making these cookies for gifts...and hoping they get returned! Yum!

And then there's this one. A little (okay, a lot) kitchy but much more stylish than using the giant black sharpie and writing MOM'S all over the carton.

Welcome to Mt.Washmore

2009-05-30T19:11:00.000-07:00

1 sick kid + 1 sick kid = 19 kabillion loads of laundry, empty hand sanitizer bottles (yes, Amanda, I know, the sanitizer doesn't kill the germs it just moves them around...I try not to think of that) and 2 sleep deprived parents.

My husband got to have throw up duty...bless him. I had an interview and then had to be at work for a meeting. Lucky guy, he had a great day. The entire house reeked of Lysol when I got home...and for that I am eternally thankful.

Both kids seem almost back to normal...now if we can just get through one more week of school we can call it summer!

The interview was...well...let's just call it good practice. No word on the job but I am not overly hopeful. No worries though...the right job is out there somewhere.

Interview...Tomorrow...YIKES!

2009-05-28T19:08:00.000-07:00

I was getting my clothes laid out for my interview tomorrow and my son was watching and making occasional comments. He asked what the big deal was..."it's just an interview, right?". Then he gave me this helpful piece of advice..."You know how you always get off subject when we're talking and end up talking about something else? Don't do that Mom...no chatting."

So I intend to have a "chat-free" interview in the morning. Hopefully it will go well.

I Confess

2009-05-27T17:40:00.001-07:00

Once again instead of doing homework (since I'm sure I'm ahead of Mary...my discussion board is done) I am looking at bizarre things on the internet. Yes, Mary, I do spend entirely too much time online...kind of like Chad and the facebook farm. Tonight my daughter and I were looking at pottery. (We are currently in a little "make your own" pottery phase around here.) And I found...these...which are disturbing...any way you look at them. I am all about freedom of expression, creativity, whatever you want to call it. But really, that arm sticking out of the wall is a bit too poltergiestish for me. Doesn't it look like it's waiting to grab some poor sucker who happens to stumble by in the dark? And did you notice it has a tattoo?? And the baby head...really...do we want to use a baby head...technically, half a baby head, as a serving dish? Ewwwww...

But if anyone is interested in PURCHASING these pieces...you can do so
here for the reasonable price of $34.00. Get them while they last.

And the Summer Looms LOOOOOONNNNNGGGG Before Me

2009-05-25T16:48:00.000-07:00

The fam and I went to pack my classroom today since we didn't have school. Okay, actually, DQ spent most of the time a)whining, b)arguing and c)leaving random bits of stuff all over my room. But I did get some packing accomplished. Good thing...time's a ticking.

We came home and I thought I might take a little nap. Great plan...except DQ needed me...often. First, her elbow hurt...did I think it was broken? Then her wrist hurt...could she use my icepack? Then she needed to look for something...not sure what...she couldn't remember...but she was certain it was in my room.

The kids swam and I napped (yes they had supervision...their dad watched them...bless him). DQ decided she wanted me to straighten her hair and swimming and showering. Now I would LOVE for my daughter to wear her hair down...ever. She prefers ponytails. So I jumped at the chance to straighten it thinking she was planning on wearing it long and straight for school tomorrow. (We did her nails yesterday...she would be so girly!!) She has beautiful, long hair. It took forever to dry it and then twice as long to straighten her waves out. It looked fabulous...and then...she put it in a ponytail.

I am now listening to DQ practice her piano (how many times can you play the same song??) which is much better than the screaming match I was listening to between her and flapjack before he was banned to his room. He knows her buttons and likes to push them. The current button is telling her she has muscles that feel like a bag of jello pudding...which makes me laugh...which doesn't help. And I am thinking about the summer...looming long in front of me...and I am hoping I actually get the job I have an interview for...cause it starts...THIS SUMMER!

Gadget Sunday...Not a Gadget...But Really Strange

2009-05-24T07:17:00.000-07:00

Are you wondering what these two pictures could possibly have in common?? Read on.

I'm a coffee lover. The stronger the better. I like the kind that can walk by itself. None of that pansy, see through stuff for me. But I'm drawing the line here. Coffee that is "good to the last puke". Yeah, not really selling the product to me. Not sure who came up with that tag line but please...head back to the drawing board.

This coffee may very well have a "rich chocolately flavor" and it may be the "finest puked coffee you've ever tasted". I personally will never know. Just the visual image of some weasel puking up my coffee beans is enough to steer me clear. But for those of you who like adventure...here you go. Try this coffee and let me know what you think.

And on a weird side note...since when does weasel mean something other than that odd animal at the top of the post? I learned a new meaning of the word just by googling images of the word "weasel". I am obviously out of touch.

Thanks to my German-speaking, kindergarten-teaching friend for the website!! Love it!

Welcome to My World

2009-05-23T14:40:00.001-07:00

Just a sneek peek at the fun we have waiting for us all summer...when DQ goes off meds. This morning started at 6:15 because that is when DQ's internal alarm went off. No matter that we were up until 11:00 last night. We were all up and at'em with the birds this morning. Usually coach does early morning duty. Today he's off umpiring a baseball playoff series so it was...my turn. I am not a morning person but today I made an effort. We went out to eat for breakfast (cause I don't actually cook breakfast...ever). It was fun (if you disregard the spilled soda, the spilled coffee, and the mess left by DQ) so we decided to go pick up the pottery we made last weekend and paint some more today.

Pottery painting...flapjack is a study in concentration. He gathers all of his supplies, makes a plan and gets started. He didn't get up once before he was done. DQ...yeah, not so organized. I swear she had 12 bottles of paint and 19 brushes to paint one piece of pottery. She had to stop periodically to go buy a snack and get some water. Painting is thirsty business. Flapjack finished and went to the kid area to watch a movie. I finished and went to pay. DQ was JUST getting started. Finally, two hours later (not kidding) she finished and we were off to the library.

It took flapjack and I about 20 minutes....DQ....took another 15 to be happy with her selections...which we will get to pay for...more on that later. Then it was off to pick up our team pictures for volleyball.

That should have been a quick trip...except I kind of got lost...and after 20 minutes gave up...and went home. I put our pottery on the chair but the sack was top heavy and fell...yep, smashed our pottery to smithereens. Lots of tears from DQ. By this time I seriously needed a nap and the kids were grouchy as well. We all stretched out and...stupid me, I actually went to sleep. I woke up to the great flood of 2009.

DQ had decided to clean house...nice thought. She started...and ended in the kitchen. I walk in the kitchen to see her in her undies...with a beach towel...standing in an inch of water in the kitchen. She wanted to mop the floor. Coach usually sprays the floor down with the sink sprayer. Coach has some control...DQ...not so much. She hosed down the entire kitchen (including her library books that she left on the counter which are now ruined). Apparently our floor slopes downward...who knew?? The water ran from the kitchen and soaked everything in the laundry room. It took 5 beach towels and a mop to clean the mess up. Yes, I yelled. Then I felt terrible because really, she was trying to be helpful...sheesh. If you wait a few minutes in my world something interesting is bound to happen. Can't wait to see what happens next.

Okay, Shoot Me Now and Put Me Out of My STUPID Misery

2009-05-21T19:24:00.000-07:00

I don't allow my kids (classroom or home) to use the word 'stupid'. I think it is an ugly word BUT I'm a grown up and my kids don't read my blog...it is official...I am the stupidest person I know. Here are a few (just a few...there are more...I'll save them for another blog) examples to show you my stupidity.

Example 1: I thought it would be nice and fun to allow my behavior class kids to participate in today's field day. Field day is a generic term for mass child chaos outdoors in the heat. 3 kids refused to participate. One just looked at each event and said, "Uh...I not good at that." and sat down. Fine, no problem at least he stayed in the area. The other two...outta there...up the fence, under the portable, across the field...BACK TO THE ROOM. The others were great and I patted myself on the back and thought, "Yeah, that was fun. I was right." Yeah...STUPID! We get back to the room and all H&^% breaks loose. These kids wigged out. There was crying and crawling and yelling and that was just me. (kidding, sort of)

Example 2: I assume telling my students ahead of time that we are all tired and need to have a good, peaceful lunch will make it so. STUPID. One kid refuses to a) go in the cafeteria, b) sit in a chair, c) stop screaming like a banshee. By the time I got to my lunch...it was cold and I was too mad to eat.

Example 3: I assume my kids are exhausted after recess. We've had field day all morning, tantrums in the room, lunch complete with screaming and recess...people it is NAP time. STUPID. Usually, my kids nap, they really, really nap. We have to force them awake when rest time is over. Today, when I need a break...they act like fools the minute the lights go out. There is crawling, hiding, laughing, and water bottles flying. Let's just say I lost it at that point. I don't raise my voice at school...I just don't. I think neutral is more effective. Yeah, screw neutrality...today, I YELLED. I think I scared them. Dang, should've tried that earlier.

Tomorrow's supposed to be Fun Friday...a play day. NOPE...my stupid wore out today. Tomorrow in my class we'll be having SEATWORK CITY.

I Need a Vacation!

2009-05-20T17:39:00.000-07:00

This is my normal knee...(yeah, disregard the fact that it's an old, seriously needing some sun, white knee)...

And this would be my other knee...after a run in with a really mad small child.

Yes, it really is twice its normal size and yes, it hurts like H#$%. And yes, I did go to work today...and no, it was not fun.

This is my arm...after the bite machine got me...(dang...my arm looks OLD! That is some really bad lighting...it does not look that way...does it?)

And this...would be DQ sympathizing with me...

And no, there is absolutely nothing wrong with her.

My Kids' Eyeballs Don't Work Right

2009-05-19T18:42:00.000-07:00

A month ago the school nurse stopped me in the hall to tell me she had given flapjack an eye exam at the request of his teacher. He flunked...badly. Had I noticed anything? Uh, no, apparently I had not. So off to the eye doctor we went. Sure enough...nearsighted...needs glasses.

Today, the school nurse stops me in the hall to tell me she gave DQ an eye exam...she flunked...even worse than flapjack. Had I noticed? Uh, yeah, this time I had...she's been to the eye doctor (Okay, not recently) and everytime he says, "Yep, at some point she'll need glasses. But not yet." Guess now's the time. So back to the eye doctor we go. Course, it can't be the SAME eye doctor. That would make life too simple. Flapjack has to go where they accept his insurance and his medicaid (compliments of the fostercare system) and DQ has been seeing an eye doctor since she was little due to other problems. DQ's eye doctor does not accept medicaid. Flapjack's eye doctor creeps me out. He talks to himself...a lot. It's icky...really. Didn't seem to bother flapjack...he was too fascinated with the equipment. Next time...his dad will be taking him.

Flapjack picked out very cool "little rectangle glasses"...of course they still aren't in...cause...the machine broke...or something. DQ wants contacts. LOL! Not happening. Hope they have some really cute glasses or we're screwed.

Pet Peeves

2009-05-18T17:15:00.000-07:00

Yeah, yeah, we've all got them...and today...I'm in the mood to share some.

People who park diagonally across two parking spaces. (Get a smaller car if you can't park the gigantic one you are driving.)
Frivolous lawsuits (Complete waste of money.)
Copiers (it's a personal issue)
Spam emails
Snotty diagnosticians who have no clue what it means to have a child with learning needs
Unexpected company (If you stop by unexpectedly don't expect me to open the door.)
People who are always late (NOT talking about my slacker friends here!)
Christmas lights in February (or Halloween lights in December)
People who come to work when they clearly don't want to be there (and then make their students suffer)
Speakerphones (especially when you are put on speakerphone unexpectedly...I don't really like surprises)
Unsolicited advice (from someone who barely knows me)
Chewing gum on the sidewalk (or anywhere but the mouth or package)

Today I sat through two meetings with parents who had to hear about their child's disabilities. It made me remember sitting through my own meeting and hearing about my daughter. The moms were both in tears by the end of the meetings. And today, I cried right along with them. Sometimes parenting and teaching is really hard work.

Gadget Sunday...Ewwwwww!

2009-05-17T16:23:00.000-07:00

I am posting late today. To be honest I almost totally forgot. That would be because I left the entire week's worth of grad school work for...today. Yeah, I'm a slacker. (Man, it kills me to admit that.)

But here you go, the gadget for the week. I'm not sure this qualifies as a gadget...it's more like a picture of a gadget. Either way, it creeps me out. Who thinks of this? Was this guy just laying around one day thinking...hey...wonder what weird thing I could do with bugs. I personally only think about annihilating bugs. To each his own I suppose.

So here you go... enjoy .

Girl Drama

2009-05-16T16:46:00.000-07:00

Girls and boys are so different. When boys get mad at each other they do this...

Then they consider it over and move on to more fun things like legos or baseball.

Girls on the other hand, fight with words and then do this...

they pout, they sulk, then they get angry all over again and it drags on and on and on like a bad movie that you can't leave cause you spent too much on the tickets and feel obligated to stay.

Now I remember why I only had a few friends growing up. I don't do girl drama. My daughter, on the other hand, has the art of girl drama mastered...and it's killing me. Yesterday she had a sleepover with friend 1, a sweet, polite child that I love having over. Today friend 1 went to the volleyball game with us and we planned to swim afterward. Enter friend 2. Friend 2 is also a sweet, polite child that I love having over. But something happens when friend 1, friend 2 and DQ get together. It's scary, really, watching the transformation. Every time I swear I will NEVER let them all three convince me they can get along. And every time...I forget...I'm old...it happens. Friend 2 plays on the volleyball team. DQ invites her to swim with her and friend 1 after the game. I agree...stupid, stupid, stupid. The girls aren't in the water 20 minutes when I am being summoned...so friends 1 and 2 can tattle on DQ. I won't get into the whole story, cause my head still hurts from sorting through it the first time. This time, I handled things differently. I told them all to get out of the pool, made them get dressed and sent friends 1 and 2 back to their moms with the warning that from now on...NO GIRL DRAMA on my watch. I am done dealing with it...really. I also had a chat with both moms who made the same promise. No more girl drama. I think I scared all three girls a bit. My teacher voice might have come out. I know for sure the hairy eyeball was out. I was MAD...but I'm over it. Cause I am home and I had ice cream...and DQ is banned from playdates...for a long, long time.

Random School Weirdness

2009-05-13T17:54:00.000-07:00

Sent a kid home earlier in the week for biting (me, repeatedly) and using inappropriate language (kid knows some serious profanity) and throwing things at his classmates (one kid cracked me up by yelling "Incoming!" when a crayon box was thrown his way)
This morning, the kid's dad meets me at the door and says, "I didn't give him his meds this morning. He didn't want to take them." Uh, huh?? I smiled and said, "Thanks so much, I'm sure it will be an interesting day." I was right.
A refugee kid said something is his native language to another kid while I was passing by. It was easy to tell (by body language and tone) that what he was saying wasn't nice. I offered a random comment like, "Hey, nice words, please." Now he thinks I'm some kind of language whiz and speak his language. He keeps finding me and saying, "adhgkdhe...what I say?"
A parent has decided the best way to make sure her kid behaves at school is to keep him sleep deprived. (Could I make this up?) He behaves. Of course he nods off every few minutes and doesn't get much done...but hey, he's not in trouble.
I've applied for 3 jobs...and heard nothing yet. Should I take that personally?
Kid came to school today with his eyebrow split open. Said he was hit by a baseball. No doctor, no stitches, just...baby powder. Who knew that was a first aid item?
My homework that is due tonight is still not done. I've been too busy reading blogs. I may need a step program.

Talent

2009-05-12T17:50:00.000-07:00

DQ has gone through every sport and hobby known to man. Soccer? Hated it. Basketball, couldn't get that darn ball anywhere near the basket and dribbling...yeah, not so much. Ballet? Kicked out cause she kept hanging on the bar like a monkey. Tap, uh, yeah, not so much. Swimming? Refuses to go underwater (even in the bathtub) without goggles. Jewelry making? I am still picking beads out of the carpet two years later. Basically I quit letting her join anything because it wasn't worth the pain involved (hers AND mine). After much begging and cajoling I finally signed her up for volleyball. She loves it and she's pretty darn good. Then recently I signed her up for piano lessons. Her teacher says DQ has "an ear" whatever that means. What I know is that she is flying through the book, practicing every day and LOVING playing the piano.

I don't know if she just really likes these two things or if she's finally growing up a bit. Either way, life in our house is good these days.

Flapjack and Nail Polish

2009-05-11T18:15:00.000-07:00

Whoa...now there's a title that could give the wrong impression. No, flapjack is not interested in painting his nails. He does, however, have some strong opinions about the nailpolish of others.

Usually I am a pink kind of girl...clearly my color...not my foot...no tattoo.

Tonight I considered a blue/green color just to be different. Flapjack was not impressed.

So I went with this color...black, with white flowers. Loved it, flapjack...not so much.

He goes on to tell me that I am "not that kind of color". He thinks I am more like a rainbow. (Have I mentioned how much I love this kid?) Then he mentions Mrs. ________ from school. He clarifies who he is talking about by saying, "You know, the really pretty blonde teacher?" He knows what color her nail polish is...and what color it was before. Hmmm...thinking my son may have a little crush. At least he picked Mrs. ____________...she could not be sweeter and is really, really a girly girl. (Unlike his mom...who is not.)

And just on a side note, while looking at images for pictures to use for this post...I noticed a lot of MALE toe nails...okay, to each his own. But I'm just saying...this...well...not my taste.

Gadget Sunday...For My Next Birthday...I Want This!

2009-05-10T13:45:00.000-07:00

This gadget (okay, again, gadget is a stretch) is something I actually want, now that I know it exists! My german-speaking, kindergarten teaching, germaphobe friend (who doesn't have a nickname yet but I'm working on it) found this and sent it to me. You know who you are!! THANKS!

So if you're a germaphobe (and strangely, most of my friends are, which kinda tells you what I'm like) you might want to check this out!

Did You Know?
Carpet can be the most germ-ridden surface in your home. It can contain approximately 200,000 microbes of bacteria per square inch, and as many as 100,000 dust mites per square yard.
A typical square inch of kitchen tile floor can contain over 2,500 bacteria.
Bacteria samples from a typical home show that the bathroom floor contains 18,025 bacteria per square inch, while the toilet seat has only 49 bacteria per square inch!"

Gotta tell you...I'll be losing some sleep over this. Germs...ewwwww! Anyway. Enjoy the link! (And did anyone notice I finally figured out how to do a link correctly??? Blogging 101...took me a while!)

Were the kids a little too loud??

2009-05-09T19:23:00.000-07:00

Hmmm...I think my kids might be annoying my neighbor. It's been warm lately and the kids have been happily making a rukus in the back yard on the trampoline. I love that thing! DQ and flapjack spend hours on it bouncing, laughing, shrieking...ya know...being kids. (And, ya know, being OUT OF MY HAIR) Okay, I did let them swim last night...at 8:30 pm (remember I'm a cool mom) and they might have been a little excited and a little loud. I only let them swim for 15 minutes. Then this morning it was nice and cool and it's SATURDAY so I let them go outside to jump on the trampoline about 8:00 am. Hey, it could've been earlier...they were up at 6:00 am.

So this afternoon when we get back from the volleyball game here's what my very sad kids see...a hole burned through the trampoline...and the cigarette butt that burned the hole...that had been flicked over the fence by the neighbors next door. I was all for going over there and giving them a piece of my mind. DQ was all for calling 911...in her mind this was an emergency!! The dad intervened. He just said from now on...we'd be taking pictures of all the illegal crap that goes on next door and giving copies to his cop friend that he shares an office with.

So neighbors...you are on notice...we put up with your assortment of strange pets...including the giant tortoise that lived next to the fence and scared the crap out of me. We've said nothing about the numerous late night, very short visits to your home (drug deal anyone?). We've been polite when your yard looked like crap and your dogs barked all night. But you are now messing with my kids and MY QUIET TIME. This is war people.

Today I Am A Cool Mom

2009-05-08T20:08:00.000-07:00

It was HOT today...really, really hot. Coach had a game out of town so DQ and I were forced to take flapjack to his baseball game and stay for the entire thing. Now before you accuse me of being a slacker mom (okay, which I am) DQ does not do so well at the ballpark. If I take my eye off of her for a second...she is gone. She doesn't really mean to wander off...she just forgets she's walking...or something like that. Anyway, we went to the game, in the sweltering heat. Good mom that I am I chose to arrive early so I could park in front...and therefore sit in the car with the windows open and watch the game. (Okay, okay, I might have been reading a novel and eating M&M's )but I did pay attention when flapjack came up to bat...and when the coach put him in as pitcher...PITCHER??? Uh, no, flapjack is a catcher...but tonight he also got to pitch. He didn't hit any kids so I consider it a successful night. (I'm getting to the cool mom part...) After the game I took the kids home and let them have the first swim of the season!! (Okay, technically the second...cause they got in the pool while their dad was vacuuming...it's my blog...let me tell this story my way!) (I had nothing to do with getting the pool clean, chlorinated, or getting the ladder put back in...but hey I am the one who let them swim!) I even let them splash me without complaint. Then I took them to Mickey D's (so DQ could order her french fry burger...yeah, ewwww!) and Bueno (so flapjack could have a burrito) and we sang to Kid's Bop LOUD the entire way home. While getting out of the car I overheard flapjack tell DQ..."Mom is cool tonight. She isn't grouchy at all!" Memories...I'll be writing that one down. It is rare that I am the cool one. That title is usually reserved for dad.

My Superhero Power

2009-05-07T19:38:00.000-07:00

I have a secret superhero power...I'm invisible! I know, it's hard to believe. I'm not always invisible...only when I am driving the mom van or shopping in my neighborhood grocery store. Apparently my van becomes invisible when I reach the highway. I know it happens because other cars zip in front of me causing me to slam on my brakes on a regular basis. (NO...it is NOT because I drive too slow. I drive the limit...everyone else speeds. I am a rule follower people.) It's starting to cause some road rage on my part. Flapjack told me I needed to chill cause other drivers couldn't actually hear me. I won't tell you what I told flapjack...it was not my best parenting moment. Then at the grocery store this lady runs into my behind. Now, I realize I am not a size 2 but I am NOT taking up the entire aisle. She clearly had room to go around me...but she didn't...she ran smack INTO me and didn't even apologize...cause she didn't see me...I'm invisible...remember?? I'm thinking I need to harness this power. I could have a lot of fun if I could just figure out how to be invisible whenever I wanted to be. Just imagine the possibilities. Until I figure it out...do me a favor...stay the heck away from my mom van on the highway. I'm a bit tired these days and the wrong person is going to zip in front of me at the wrong time on the wrong day and...well...darn it...I might just cuss.

Student With Pink Eye + Lazy Parent =

2009-05-06T08:25:00.000-07:00

Dear Parent,

Last Friday we sent your kid home with suspected pinkeye. I appreciate your heading to the doctor immediately. On Monday, your kid came back to school with...pinkeye. Uh, ma'am, when the doctor gives you a prescription for eye drops...the idea is to get it filled and actually put the drops in your kid's eyes. I understand you were sleeping when the nurse called you on Monday morning asking about the drops. You said you had a note saying he/she could be in school...but couldn't bring it cause...you were sleeping. No problem. Our handy, dandy truant officer was happy to pick it up. Yep, you had a note saying your child could return to school on Monday since the eye drops would have worked by then...if you had actually USED them. I had to allow your kid to come back in class with gooey, pink, hurting eyes even though I KNEW the germies would be everywhere. Did you take a good look yesterday before dropping your kid off at...9:00 am?? (According to your kid it took a long time to unstick the goo from the eyes.) Did you see the eyes were swollen, crusty and that yellow eye goo was half way down the face? This time the nurse called again and said no school until you get new drops since the first ones obviously weren't working...cause they never left the medicine bottle! So this morning...I wake up...with PINK EYE. Thanks, I really needed a day off...in the middle of the week...yeah, not so much.

Busy Day, Random Thoughts

2009-05-05T19:00:00.000-07:00

So is it wrong to blog when I should be doing homework? Ummm, nope, nope it's not. Today was a busy one. I left at 7:00am and finally made it home at 8:00pm. I think I should be asleep. I saw my rheumatologist today. That guy kind of scares me...really. He uses very big words that I try to remember so I can google them later and find out what they mean. I did ask questions on the first visit...but he answered me with words I couldn't understand and I didn't want to look stupid...so...I stopped asking many questions. Anyway, I asked him today when the "feeling normal" part would kick in and he told me this is the normal part...my "new normal". He also said if I didn't have so much to do (kids, work, school, sports, ya know, life)I would probably feel better. Schmuck. He then said he believed people with illnesses causing chronic pain (like lupus, arthritis, etc) should learn to "deal with it". Yeah, he did. I responded, "Spoken like someone who has never lived with chronic pain." Again, schmuck. I agree with him actually, it just burned me up to hear him say it so flatly.

But to brighten my day I got to see my BFF...the hairdude. He made me blonde...er. Two hours spent listening to the hairdude tell funny stories, having my hair done by someone other than myself AND not having any children that I am responsible for anywhere near me...PRICELESS. And I got to watch the owner (a woman in her 60's) color women's hair and eyebrows (who knew they did that!?) while wearing a lingerie type top that left nothing to the imagination. Entertaining to say the least!

Then I got to spend some time with a long lost friend drinking milkshakes and wondering why in the world some people wear the clothes they wear in public. Obviously I am feeling just a tad judgemental today. Sorry. Yeah, not really. We all have those days.

Today's my sister's birthday. I love that she will always be older than me! And as of tomorrow, she is closer to 50 than she will ever be to 40. LOVE YA, SIS!!

And finally, my preggo commando friend has a sweet baby boy! She is superwoman! And I have no doubt he is going to be superbaby and make his parents very proud! Miss you at work, friend!

I Need A GPS

2009-05-04T19:35:00.001-07:00

I have a confession to make (yes, another one!)...I got lost today...in the town I have lived in for the last twenty-one years. (Don't tell my husband...he'll laugh at me...again.) Apparently any brain cells I had that dealt with directional ability died in the great booze fest I like to call college. I'm not sure I had any directional abilities before college but I am quite sure I haven't had them since. It's kind of scary to get lost in a little town like mine...kind of scary and kind of ridiculous all at the same time. I can get lost going somewhere I have been repeatedly. If the billboards change, a tree gets cut down or heaven forbid, a new store opens up...it becomes a whole new world for me. I think a GPS would help me out...a lot. I could (okay, SOMEONE could) program that sucker to get me where I need to go before I leave the house each day. As long as I don't make any unnecessary detours I should be just fine. The problem would be if I screwed up the programing...cause that voice saying over and over and over "Turn left at the next available street" when there are NO STREETS available might just cause me to have a breakdown right there on the road. Maybe I'm not meant to drive. Yeah, that's it...I'm actually meant to have a chauffeur! Any offers??

Gadget Sunday...It's a Stretch (Okay, Lie) To Call This a Gadget

2009-05-03T12:45:00.000-07:00

But since nothing else has popped up lately on my internet I'm going with it. This is brought to you compliments of my friend Mary who apparently has an eye for strange things. (Mary, your facebook sidebar is WAY more interesting than mine. With the exception of that strange dead woman's head that scared me, I get all boring stuff.)

So here's the link. http://www.thepignextdoor.com/ I think the timing is spot on for this item. I'm sure we will all rush out to become members. Okay, I won't. I don't now nor have I ever eat pork. It wasn't in our house growing up (strange food things I grew up with...that's a whole nother blog post) so I never developed a taste for it. I still don't like the taste. But for those of you who do...now you are set!

The Lingering Smell of Lysol

2009-05-02T19:14:00.000-07:00

Can a person have enough Lysol? Not in my germaphobic world. I have been sick for a week. Not sick enough to brave the germ-infested urgent care clinic but sick enough to feel like staying in bed all day and doing absolutely nothing. Which I did today since I don't have to work on Saturday. Today my son joined me. I think we might need a quarantine sign. For him I will brave the germ-infested pediatrician's office and see the doctor Monday. Poor kid, bad sore throat and temp...I'm guessing strep. (I always have a diagnosis before we go in. Bet the dr. appreciates my input. ) I hate waiting until Monday but that's how the rigamaroll of Medicaid and BCBS works. My son has to see his primary physician or get permission from him to see someone else. Have I mentioned that I hate Medicaid? Flapjack came with Medicaid due to his being in the foster system before we adopted him. There are so many nutty rules with Medicaid. And never call that place. If you actually get a human voice you can almost bet it's a rude one...and if you make the mistake of being rude back...they hang up on you and make you start over...accidentally of course. So, if you're reading say a prayer for flapjack. He is pretty miserable.

No Co-Mingling

2009-05-01T16:12:00.000-07:00

No co-mingling.

Did you know co-mingling was a term? Yeah, me either, until today.

It's no longer allowed in my district. Know what that means? No field trips, no assemblies, no concerts, no banquets, no traveling to other campuses, no after school anything. Know why? Cause apparently co-mingling can spread the flu...who knew? This new edict which went out today has a lot of people up in arms. I'm kind of a homebody...I hate crowds...I hate socializing...so, really, it doesn't bother me. And, I happen to have a kid who has a funky, often ineffective immune system...so the thought of the H1N1 flu (how's that for politically correct)(or any other bug for that matter) in her class or in her vicinity makes me a bit nervous. Course, a lot of things make me nervous...killer bees, rattlesnakes (like the three foot long one killed this morning on my campus! Uh, yeah, I wish I didn't know about it!) storms, mosquitoes (malaria, people!), weird stalkers, the list goes on!! So I am trying not to think about the darn flu...but I confess...a week off of work...well, sounds just a tiny bit tempting.

Sweet Innocence of Children

2009-04-30T17:42:00.000-07:00

I witnessed something today that reminded me why I love my job. My kids earned recess time and it was beautiful outside today. While we were out another class (kindergarten) joined us on the playground. Two of the sweetest little girls (both refugee children from Africa) entertained us with songs in their native language. What were they singing? I think their teacher called it the "Hallelujah Song". I couldn't understand a word but honestly it was the most precious sight seeing these two little girls, huge grins, sweet voices, clapping hands. It was the highlight of my week.

A Post For The Stalker

2009-04-29T17:46:00.000-07:00

Dear Crazy Blog Stalker,

Geez buddy (please be a buddy and not a buddette) you have seen my frickin eyeball and that's it. Trust me, not on my best day in my best skinny jeans (which now live in the very, very, very back of my closet cause they no longer fit my fat bohiney) I do NOT resemble Barbie or any of the other strange females you have compared me to. But just to reassure you I am breaking my rule of anonymity and posting one pic taken by my daughter. Here you go...sleazeball. Ain't I a peach??

I have a question for any bloggers out there who might be reading. Do you ever get strange emails?? Really, really strange emails from an oddball who reads your blog? Today, I am thankful for anonymity. Although I realize some of you know me I doubt seriously any of you are responsible for the weird series of emails some strange pervert has been sending me. I am thankful I set up an email account just for this blog...and if you are the perv who's been emailing me...I'm not checking the account anymore...so knock it off and go pick on someone else.

I could understand if I wrote smutty or even remotely appealing blog posts...but I have read my blog...ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. Sometimes it bores even me. This dude (please be a dude and not a dudette) is just whacked. He finds smut in the most ridiculous phrasing. I had actually considered a post that was...for me...a bit out there...it was all about...well, I have seen it called...nevermind...I just can't go there. It weirds me out. Now I am thankful I refrained. I also considered copying and pasting his/her/its emails here for you guys to read...but I just can't. They creep me out. So you'll just have to take my word for it.

I installed this counter thingy (again, I am not techno literate and obviously not blog literate) that tells me where people who read the blog are. That little counter is very cool...did you know someone from Pakistan, someone from Germany, and several someones from Canada have seen this blog? No words for that...okay, I lied. I have words for everything. Obviously I am not the only person addicted to reading the random crap from people's everyday life. Oh man...I am a stalker too...but at least I don't send crazy emails. Be thankful.

Those Who Haven't Adopted Should Not Give Me Advice

2009-04-28T15:22:00.000-07:00

SO...I got a little message from the director of the agency that we used when adopting DQ. Apparently...our daughter's birthmom thinks we haven't been doing a very good job staying in touch. Yeah...this is contact #2. The first one came after I didn't send the darn pictures at Christmas. I did send them...really, really, really late, but I sent them. SO...DQ had a birthday this month. I didn't send pictures or write a letter or call or email or any of that other crap I am expected to do. And, neither did the birthmom. But, I get a friendly (actually, not so friendly) reminder anyway. The director...bless her...(yeah, not really what I am thinking) thinks she knows all about the feelings that go with adoption cause she has done so many adoptions. She does NOT actually have any adopted kids, however. She does not need to be giving me advice. Technically, DQ is mine. Technically, I could move and leave no forwarding address. Technically, I am not required to send DQ's birthmom anything. I do it out of the kindness of my heart and because it is what I think DQ will have wanted when she is older. But today...I really want to change my number, my email address and my mailing address...just because technically I can.

And while I am venting about people who should not give advice...please do not tell pregnant women that not breastfeeding will cause their baby to be dumb. Especially when I (with my non-breastfed kids) am sitting RIGHT BESIDE YOU.

And, don't tell me you think you have lupus cause you are tired from not sleeping. I might just feel the need to tell you what I really think of you and your hypochondriac ways...stupid.

Okie doke...think that covers my gripes for today. Think I'll go have me some cookies. Cause today, darn it, I deserve them!

Random...Really?

2009-04-26T18:10:00.000-07:00

I have been accused of being random. Whatever. I find it offensive really. Random, me? Nah...ADD...probably. Antsy...definitely. Random...really, I just don't see it. (Okay, maybe I do and I just don't want to admit it because that would mean they are right and I am wrong and people, I am just never wrong.) But for those of you who appreciate randomness, here's some fun random facts for you.

Ants never sleep. (and they obviously have serious ADHD)

Singapore has only one train station...and I care because???

The human brain is 80% water which explains the sloshing I hear whenever I shake my head.

During your lifetime you'll eat about 60,000 pounds of food. That's the weight of six elephants. (I think I'm there already...)

A sneeze travels out of your mouth at a rate of 100 m.p.h. (Which explains why teachers of small children are always covered in snot and why I bathe in sanitizer.)

If you yell for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have enough energy to heat a cup of coffee. (So the car alarm kid in my room DOES have hope for a meaningful job at some point.)

Every time you lick a stamp you gain 1/10 of a calorie. (Online bill pay, people!)

Children laugh about 400 times a day. Adults only laugh an average of 15 times a day. (All the more reason to work with children.)

In an average day a five year old child will ask 437 questions. (Okay, no wonder I am so ready for quiet when I get home!)

Sex is biochemically no different than eating large quantities of chocolate. (Hmmm...)

The advantage of exercising everyday is that you will die healthier.

And there you have them. My random facts for the day.

Gadget Sunday...Need a Gift for a Gardener?

2009-04-26T01:49:00.000-07:00

I've got just the thing. How about a mini veggie garden on your keychain? This little gadget comes with soil, a vegetable seed and a glass pendant for growing. When the plant gets too big, take it out, repot it and start all over. Interesting idea except it costs $84!! For that price I could plant an entire garden in my backyard. I guess it's for those city types who don't have room for greenery. Here's the link just in case anyone wants to spring for a garden in your pocket.

http://www.japantrendshop.com/green-capsule-mini-mobile-garden-p-443.html

I Have a Farm

2009-04-24T19:38:00.000-07:00

in Africa...oh wait...that's not me...

...okay...it's not a real farm...no crops (I'm too lazy to harvest them) but I do have many trees thanks to my farming neighbors and I have animals...pigs, horses, cows, dogs. Impressed yet? Yeah, don't be. If it weren't for the help of my farming neighbors Chad, Janet and occasionally Mary...my farm would be nothin but wasteland. It is very sad that I suck at facebook farming. I wish my "friends" the facebook addicts (Yes, you know who you are!) would STOP sending me farm gifts. I noticed when I logged on today that I have 3 farm gifts...and Chad once again stepped up and worked on my farm for me. What a guy that Chad is!

What the heck is up with the facebook addiction? Why do I(and 9 kabillion other people) feel the need to log in and see what trivial...hmmm....'stuff' people are up to. I think it is like the blog...it allows me to escape from the nine million things I should be doing...like homework, housework, parenting. Whatever it is I need people to stop sending me random gifts. I don't need cyber drinks...but you are welcome to send me real ones. I have no more room on my farm for animals...although I like trees...you can harvest them even if you haven't been around in days...those darn crops just die. I like flair...you can send me that...just not the obscene stuff... Forget the eggs, the beads, the assorted other holiday junk...that's like the darn farm gifts...just sad. The notes are fun...especially Mary's. I love looking at the pictures of my high school friends...who all look old like me...some look even older...love that! Hmmm...maybe that's why we all like facebook so much (okay, not ALL of us...Bob and Sally Mae Mander apparently have no time in their busy days for facebook...very sad) it is kind of kid like, fun, random and you get to see your friends and their families and if you don't like someone...you just don't be their friend...okay, that aspect is very appealing...admit it. Yep, that must be it.

And in case anyone cares...I've been kidnapped to Berlin with the Statue of Liberty Play...and I'm not escaping...I think I might like it there!

Thinking In My Head

2009-04-23T18:38:00.000-07:00

How's that for a random title? Do you ever think something to yourself...but not say it out loud...and then you get more information later...and you are SO glad you didn't say anything aloud earlier...cause you would've sounded like a moron? Okay, that happens to me WAY too often. Lately, I'm thinking the bleach from my highlights has seeped in and damaged my brain cells. I'm gonna have to talk to the hair dude...blonde might NOT be my color. So, I'm going to give you one example of my brain's moronic thinking...just for fun. I was in a friend's class earlier this week. It was hot because the air conditioning still hadn't been turned on. Then in walks two maintenance guys...one points a handy, dandy little gun thingy and it shines a red light up on the vent near the ceiling. My friend says, "Yay! The air conditioner is getting turned on!" Now...here's the in my head thinking part...I'm thinking...wow, that is the coolest way to turn on an air conditioner that I have ever seen. I wonder how that works. This is a really old building...when the heck did they upgrade the air...no way did that come with the building. So I jokingly tell the guy I want his gun thingy. He laughs and goes on. Later I see him again...in the hall with the principal...and he says, "This one (yeah...one...whatever)tried to steal my gun"...uh, steal...MAJOR exaggeration...but anyway...so I say, "yeah that is a cool gadget" and my principal looks puzzled and says...yeah a temperature reader is pretty cool I guess...A WHAT?? Oh, duh...he wasn't turning on the air...he was checking the temperature to make sure it was cooling correctly...I am such a dork. I have plenty of other examples...but really...I would hate for you all to know how truly blonde I am.

Flapjack At His Finest

2009-04-22T16:40:00.000-07:00

Today, for the first time, I wish I could show you a picture of my son. Unfortunately, doing so might nix my anonymity so you will just have to use your imagination...you have one...right? So my son brought his class picture home. We've all seen class pictures. This one is basically the same. So...picture a group of second graders...all standing sweetly looking at the camera...picture flapjack...he's the tall kid at the middle of the back row. He's got blonde hair cut in a flat top...he's a big, tall, husky kid. Okay, now that the stage is set. Now picture every kid smiling, teacher smiling and then picture flapjack...shoulders pressed up against his ears, eyes squinched shut...and a ginormous...goony grin plastered across his face. My son...gotta love him.

I Have Created a Hypochondriac

2009-04-21T17:44:00.000-07:00

I did it. It's my fault. There you go, there's my confession. DQ has become a hypochondriac...and I think I made her that way. When she was little, before we knew exactly what was wrong with her, I anguished over every rash, every fever and every cough. Yeah, now I am paying for that over attention. DQ came running in tonight...in her undies...with a panicked look on her face..."MOM...it's a bump!!" Now, DQ had a bad, ugly, horrid, MRSA infection (nasty contagious staph) and it was unforgettable...think scalpels and bandages and 40+ days of an antibiotic that smelled like toilet bowl water...no kidding...when she was 5. I think she might be scarred for life. So I know bumps scare her...but people, it was a mosquito bite...a teeny, tiny, get out the microscope mosquito bite.

And she had a headache, a stomach ache, a toe ache...did I think she was...gasp...SICK? Uh no, my vote is tired. Early to bed tonight. Love my daughter.

Skating or Flat on My Behiney...you choose

2009-04-20T19:25:00.000-07:00

So tonight was skate night. Flapjack had baseball practice and couldn't go. Since I am involved with PTA and PTA sponsors skate night I try to go to all of them. DQ goes with me so she can eat pizza and socialize...skating just isn't her thing...she prefers mooching money from the parent coordinator to buy stupid prizes. But I digress...as usual...and yes, Mary, I think I do have ADD...thanks for noticing. ANYWAY, I got excited cause Pippi showed up with her sister for skate night. It is RARE for any teachers to show their faces at skate night so this was BIG. And Pippi has her own roller blades...she is awesome (okay...she is maybe 22...actually...I am not sure she is even that old...she looks about 15) We were skating and the floor help (ya know...the cool dudes...okay...the dorks in the zebra shirts that fly by you at the speed of light and scare the crap out of you) tried over and over to get Pippi's attention. Sadly, she wasn't interested. Apparently she has taste in men! The zebra guys were disappointed.

And kudos to Pippi and her sister for not cackling hysterically when I nearly busted my bohiney trying to avoid squishing some poor kid flat as a pancake. I busted it people...it was not pretty.

Finally, holy guacamole...one pissy post while I'm in a bad mood and look who comes out of the woodwork to post a comment...it's Sally Mae Mander...get it salamander?? Hey girlie...you named yourself! :) Come on back anytime and share your feelings, friend. You know I love you! And I get a smack down from Mary AND a morning phone call. Made my day Mary! AND Dr. Quinn you should really sign your posts! :) I am in a better humor today...but I am still planning on a smack down of my own if a certain someone opens her enormous mouth tomorrow...stay tuned! Can I just say how much I love spellchecking my blog posts? I am making up my own language apparently. Whatever.

Lupus Monday - on Sunday

2009-04-19T17:31:00.000-07:00

I am finished with homework and with class for an entire week. Woohoo! So I decided to do a lupus post. Really, if one more schmuck tells me I look great or I look too healthy to be sick or some other crap in that neighborhood...I may hurt them. I am not normally a complainer (although I am considering becoming one). I grew up with a precious mom who liked to regale everyone...you know...the check out girl, the mailman, the church friends, with tales of her ailments. (She really did have a lot of junk wrong with her and she was a stay at home mom so I get her need to talk...) I swore when I was little I wouldn't do that. And for the most part I don't. I keep thinking if I don't talk about it...it will go away. But I have decided I need a response to the schmucks who say crap like...you look great...meaning...you're not really sick are you? So here you go...

If someone asks how I'm feeling...and I am having a sucky day...I plan to say tired.

T - totally fatigued and wanting to be anywhere but right here talking to you

I - itchy, itchy, itchy

R - really irritated that you feel the need to ask me how I feel each and every day

E - emotionally exhausted

D - drenched in sweat thanks to my meds and the hot flash side effects

Or maybe I will say I am happy.

H - hurrying to yet another dang doctor's appointment

A - armed and dangerous so don't bug me

P - positive that you are one of the stupidest people I have ever met

P - piling up a mountain of medical bills

Y - yearning for this to be a mistake that will go away tomorrow

Of course, I have no need to ask them how they are. If they are asking me AGAIN about my health (am I am regretting AGAIN telling anyone I even have lupus) they are A) running around in great health and feeling sorry for me (I hate that) or B)full of ailments they are hoping to share with me. I am assuming they are FINE. (I take no credit for this)

F - f^%&ed up (sorry for hurting your eyes)

I - insecure

N - neurotic

E - emotionally unbalanced

So there you go. That about covers my feelings on lupus today. I'll leave you with this.

Gadget Sunday...You Have Got to be Kidding!

2009-04-19T00:01:00.000-07:00

Today's gadget comes from a friend...love that you guys are looking at strange and unusual stuff on the Internet, too. I feel less odd now. Thanks, Mary! Love ya!

So here's the link. http://www.chiaobama.com/ Go visit...the link has a time lapse video of this sucker growing hair...a little freaky if you ask me. And really, I personally have no use for this gadget...and short of being maybe a cat feeder or something along those lines...I can't imagine anyone needing it. But obviously some schmuck somewhere bought them...or they wouldn't still be for sale.

*For the anonymous soul who emailed me to let me know that ellipses...ya know...these dot thingys I am so fond of...should not be overused...this post hopefully has more than enough ellipses to really bug you...did you not read my profile? I really, really don't give a rat's behind about your opinion of my writing...cause I don't know you...nor do I want to...but thanks for giving me the name for these dot thingys...I will call them ellipses from now on...every time I use them...Okay?? And for the benefit of anyone who might be reading this and is curious about the proper use of ellipses...obviously I could care less what they are used for...I use them when I am thinking crap that I shouldn't type...and it works for me...but for everyone else...here's the %$^# definition -

Ellipses

An ellipsis is a series of three points with spaces between them (. . .) inserted into a quotation to indicate the omission of material from the original quotation. There are quite a few simple rules for the proper use of ellipses, which are used more often in legal writing than most forms of writing, since lawyers often (generally too often) quote material from other sources. Failure to use the proper form of an ellipsis could misrepresent the work of another person and result in legal liability for the writer. Correct use of ellipses, on the other hand, shows that the writer has carefully attended to detail, and thus increases the reader's confidence in the reliability of the written work.

The Day DQ Was Born

2009-04-18T08:07:00.001-07:00

Most moms have precious, joyous memories of the day their child was born. Seeing them for the first time, holding them for the first time, memorizing their little faces. My memories include some of those things...but they are also filled with sadness and grief. I try not to think back to that day except on DQ's birthday. Usually the joy of the day now tempers the feelings I have when I remember her birth. The day she was born went something like this:

7:00 am - The phone rings and it is K's mom telling us K is in labor! It is a Saturday so we are still sleeping but this call throws us in to high gear. We have to travel to a town 4 hours a way...we throw things into suitcases...get the already packed baby bag...try to get hotel reservations only to find there aren't many thanks to something going on in town. We finally secure reservations...start packing and the car and

7:30 am - The phone rings again. It is K's mom again and she says, "I really don't want to have to tell you this. (My heart sinks to my toes.) T (DQ's birthdad) doesn't want you at the hospital." I ask if we should even come at this point and she says yes, she thinks we should. I hear the hesitation in her voice. So we continue packing...much more slowly...with few words and we start the trip. We take our time, stopping for a long breakfast, stopping at a touristy town to window shop and buy fudge. We can't find our hotel and by the time we finally get checked in it is 3:00 pm. We unload and our hotel phone rings. It is K telling us DQ has been born and that T has had a change of heart...to come to the hospital. T is waiting in the parking lot when we get there. He tells us all is fine and the hospital knows it is an adoption. Then we learn DQ is in the NICU and there were some problems during the birth. We see K and her mom and then scrub in to see DQ for the first time. At this point it all seems surreal...it doesn't feel as if I am seeing my baby...I am just seeing 'a' baby. DQ is hooked to wires and leads and has an IV. The nurse is kind, she lets us watch her clean DQ up and we take pictures. She encourages us to touch DQ and talk to her. She makes a set of footprints for us. Then she asked what we plan to name her and says they will begin calling her by that name. I hesitate...because by now I am not sure...not sure if this is meant to be our baby...not sure what her name will really be. But I let it go.

5:00 pm - We leave the hospital and look for a place with one hour photo developing. We drop off our film and have dinner. I have no clue what we talked about. I remember being so excited and so scared all at the same time. The minute we matched with K it felt as this baby was ours...we walked in faith those few months...even when K said things that made me question her intent. Now those questions were all I could think about.

7:00 pm - We pick up pictures, hurry to the hotel and look at the pictures over and over. We memorize DQ's face and fingers and toes. We wonder if she will be in the hospital long. We wonder if she will have lasting effects from the birth. We both know it wouldn't matter...she has already won our hearts.

9:00 pm - The phone rings. It is K. She is crying. We talk for a long time and she tells me...she just can't do it. She's sorry...she feels terrible...but she just can't let us have her. I try to say the right things and I encourage her to be sure. Then I tell her she needs to call the agency worker and visit with her about her change of heart. I hang up the phone and burst into tears. We are up most of the night...crying, praying and staring into space. My heart feels hollow and broken. This was not how I envisioned this night would feel.

Obviously K changed her mind again. She actually changed it repeatedly over the course of the next few days and she never really reconciled with the fact that she did finally sign papers to allow us to adopt DQ. My daughter's very first birthday is one that I often wish I could simply redo...but if I did...I wouldn't have the incredible feelings of joy and thankfulness that I have every time I think back to that day. So today as I remember K and T and the sacrifice they made to allow us to be parents I am thankful to them...and I am so sad that they can't see what a precious child they made. We have no contact with T. I wish he knew how much DQ looked like him. I wish he could see how joyful she is and how she makes us laugh. Some days I wish K and T lived down the street and could see DQ often. Other days (okay, most days) I wish I had never met them and that DQ was only ours...but that is just not the way it is. Adoption is just not easy.

Walking, Walking, and Birthdays

2009-04-17T18:22:00.000-07:00

My preggo commando friend and I walk 3 days a week after school. We usually walk for an hour around and around and around the gym. We have to change directions cause my friend gets dizzy. We spend most of that hour talking, laughing and occasionally venting. (The commando adds weights to the package to make it a tougher workout...I bring my tea.) It's great for both of us...although lately I do worry she may walk that baby right out on the gym floor...which would completely freak me out...cause I have seen childbirth (that's a whole nother story) and I have NO desire to see it again. (Really, it left me with visuals I do not need. But K...if you're reading this...I love ya...just seen way more of you than I needed to!) So today...we walked for an hour. Then I met another friend 10 minutes later to walk and visit. I haven't seen this friend in a little while and we had a lot to catch up on...so we walked...for another hour. We made 4 miles. I almost died the last 1/2 mile...really. I was trying to smile cause this friend runs...long distance...and I didn't want to embarrass myself. By the time I made it home...I couldn't reach my shoes to untie them. I think somewhere in the chatting, laughing and venting I forgot that I have lupus arthritis (did ya know there was such a thing?)...but I REMEMBER right this minute cause dang my legs are killing me...really. Lupus sucks...really.

My daughter turns 11 tomorrow. How is it possible that the little tiny baby I first saw hooked to wires and IV's in the NICU is now a healthy, happy drama queen? She is very excited about tomorrow's plans. No party...just a friend coming to spend the day. But there will be cake, presents, pizza...all the good stuff. She told me tonight that we weren't allowed to sing the birthday song...cause she is too old for it. Whatever...I am singing! She's getting exactly what she wants (for a change)...an IPOD nano. (Okay, she asked for a cell phone too...an IPHONE...yeah, so not happening.) She has a volleyball game tomorrow...but I have been instructed not to tell anyone on the team that it is her birthday. Funny...DQ has such a big personality...but she hates to be the center of attention. I just love my daughter and I am, oh so blessed, to have her! You can bet I'll be dragging my tired behind out of bed bright and early tomorrow to help her celebrate!

ZZZzzzzz....

2009-04-16T19:13:00.000-07:00

Wow...where's this excuse been my whole life?? I have obviously not been getting enough shut eye! Nite!

Tea, Taxes and the News

2009-04-15T20:04:00.000-07:00

Two blog posts in one night...I am a)really bored and b)procrastinating and not doing my homework...again. (Actually I am waiting on Bob to give me a homework tutorial and apparently Bob has found better things to do with his time than tutor me. Thanks, Bob, I owe you one.) So I am watching the news...and they are talking about tea and taxes...huh? Since when is it a rule that you have to drink tea to pay taxes? Dang, the IRS police are bound to be knocking at my door any minute. Heck, I'll switch to Coke...no problem... who needs tea?? Our newsguy (poor sap in a suit) is trying desperately to get someone to talk to him at the post office about filing taxes late. Okay, without giving any identifying info out (cause I'm all about being anonymous) I don't live in a city. There are TWO reporters out...one on the south side...and one two minutes away on the north side. Really, do we need to hear them trying to make conversation about late tax filers when there is clearly NO ONE at the post office? Gotta love small town news.

Our news station has reached a new low with their feature...SPIN THE WHEEL and find the local criminal of the week?? Seriously? Why the heck do I watch the news??

Parenting, Mowing and the Lounge Lizards

2009-04-15T18:04:00.000-07:00

Apparently my family is under the impression that I am a live-in maid. Wrong. So I am taking steps to correct this assumption. It's a well know fact (among friends and family) that I have issues with cleanliness...not a darn thing wrong with that. My family, on the other hand, wouldn't know clean if it bit'em in the bohiney. I've tried and tried to train them...nothing works. SO I am hitting them where it hurts...the piggy bank. I have a large jar...and if I have to clean up after you...you have to pay me 50 cents. People, I am raking in the dough. Pretty soon I am out of here and headed for Tahiti. (Well, except I don't fly. Maybe I'll just head to the nearest hotel.) Flapjack caught on quick...he's a bit tight with his cash. I should pay him to clean up after DQ...cause that girl has no clue where her money's at and no clue what clean is. But I'm afraid that might create some ugly sibling issues. (I want a clean house, I don't want my kids to need therapy!)

I have considered charging my spouse but I think that might be pressing my luck...

So I offered to mow the lawn today. I knew the answer would be no. My husband doesn't allow me near the lawn mower anymore. He even padlocked the shed...and hid the key...how rude is that? The summer he had knee surgery and I took over the lawn duty I managed to mow over the ground wire twice. Okay, who knew we had a ground wire. (What the heck is a ground wire?) And why would it be in the grass where I couldn't see it if it's important? And yes, the electrician thought it was hilarious the second time I had to call him. Also, I prefer circles to stripes...what is with men and their lawn lines. Circles are prettier...don'tcha think? I won't tell you what happened to the edger. Let's just say my husband got a new one for Christmas that year. So, anyway, I offered, as a hint that...the lawn needs HELP. Thinking it may need help for a while. We will be the saddest lawn on the block. I really hate that.

Finally, to my lizzie friends, Pippi and Dr. Quinn...you guys crack me up. I think the flowers were WAY over the top Pippi...but they did smell nice. Lunch is much more fun when the two of you are there.

Random Things I Love/Hate About My Job...and An Open Letter to the Lounge Lizards

2009-04-14T16:48:00.000-07:00

A few random things I hate about my job:

bruises, bites, scratches and black eyes

administrators who yell at me

parents who don't like their kids

the birds (I used to love them, until I learned they poop indiscriminately...on your head...and it smells...BAD...and makes you gag

A few random things I love about my job:

the kids...they make me laugh on a daily basis (even when they don't mean to)

the rooster that keeps crowing long after sunrise

recess

rest time (this one should probably be first!)

my parking spot...away from the rooster...okay, away from everything but I do get great exercise going to and from my car

the maintenance guy who keeps coming back to put more metal flashing over the holes I keep making in the rotted ramp leading to my door (I guess heels and rotted wood are not a good mix)

the nine kabillion ladybugs who live in my classroom...who knew you could have an infestation of ladybugs

seeing DQ and flapjack randomly throughout the day

having time to spend with my friends...which leads to....

Dear Lounge Lizzies,

Yep, this one's for you and you know who you are! It's good that we are all friends...and I use that term loosely...considering who we share the lounge with. With the exception of the dude with the bowtie (and the way cool shirts) we are all female...so you would think we could get along. Oh wait, all female...nope that's a cat fight waiting to happen. I just want to make it clear Pippi and Dr. Quinn...I do not need a prayer intervention. Besides...who's gonna be praying? You two and my imaginary friends in cyber space? (Yes, Mary, I know you are praying...but not about my blogging...right?) I have not yet said anything that I have regretted saying...although...this blog is very young. Anything can happen. I so appreciate the two of you getting laughs from the blog and then sharing them with the ENTIRE lounge. Be careful who you share with. My next blog entry might just be about them. That could make lunch time very awkward. Love you guys, really! :)

To my preggo commando friend...I am voting for Monday, April 20. I may need to wager with the gym guy.

Day in the Life

2009-04-13T13:34:00.000-07:00

Mornings are just not my best time of day. (Really, for anyone who knows me, that is a huge understatement.) But today I had a rare opportunity. My kids left early with their dad to go visit the grandparents. I had the entire day to myself...and a ton of homework. So I made myself get up early, set up my books, my computer, my coffee...then decided to clean house first...cause I can't concentrate when things aren't where they belong. House clean, I sat back down to do homework...but my coffee was cold so I went to get some more. Then I noticed the laundry needed to be put away...that would bug me, so I put the laundry away, got coffee and sat back down. I started my homework and quickly determined I needed some kind of Excel tutorial cause that stupid spreadsheet was not cooperating. But all my grad school peeps are at work today...bless their hearts...so I skipped that assignment with plans to do the next...but...by this time...I was tired so...I took a nap.

Basically I blew the entire day. Yes, my house is clean, the laundry's done and my kids have clothes ironed and laid out for the week (have I mentioned that damn OCD?) but my homework...still not done.

I haven't heard from my kids today. I am hoping that's a good thing. I am also hoping they don't come home with more crap...from the barn. My father-in-law has a barn bigger than his house. You have to see it to believe it. It is FULL of...stuff...that he has collected over the years. He pawns it off on my kids a piece at a time...they love it...me, not so much.

Too Much Candy + Too Little Caffeine = Mommy Meltdown

2009-04-12T17:35:00.000-07:00

I did something today that I rarely do (anymore...no comments Stepford Sis...I have grown up since we lived under the same roof) I yelled at my kids...loudly...and more than once. By the time I woke up this morning my kids had inhaled half the candy in their baskets. (Darn that bunny...got carried away with chocolate this year!) DQ was wired...seriously. The coffee was almost gone. Guess coach was feeling the need for caffeine today, too. Since DQ's cold/sinus/infection has not improved we opted to stay in today. Nothing like a day indoors with kids on a sugar high. (Damn that bunny)

By this afternoon I was done. DQ and flapjack were running circles through the house and leaving destruction in their path. My house was trashed (okay, exaggeration, my house is never trashed) and my patience was shot (not an exaggeration...I was seeing red). I'm sure my neighbors heard me...and applauded cause I'm positive they were tired of hearing my kids screaming, too. (We had the windows open to enjoy the fresh air...and allow the neighbors to share our joy on Easter.) I banned them to their respective rooms so we could all have a little peace and quiet. Then I took a nap...remember I said too little caffeine?? (And, hey, I cooked today and everything...doesn't that mean I deserve a nap?)

When I woke up (to wails and tears and drama) DQ showed me her new shiner...that she got while taking a bath...in her swimsuit...while playing with assorted kitchen utensils and mermaid barbie (really, don't ask). Apparently flapjack snuck in the bathroom while she was playing/swimming/making a holy mess and pushed her face first in to the soap dish. Okay, I left them banned to their rooms and an hour later there is a tidal wave in my bathroom and my kid has a black eye.

Tomorrow my kids are going with their dad to visit the grandparents. I am not invited...really, that's a good thing. I will have an entire day to myself...ahhhh...can't wait.

Gadget Sunday...Just Because

2009-04-11T21:44:00.000-07:00

Even on Easter Sunday...I feel the need to share a gadget. Actually, it's not really a gadget. It's more an oddity. But hey, it's a holiday, pretend.

So, here you go. The link makes me laugh. That's why this is the gadget of today.

http://www.eatmecrunchy.com/how-it-works.html

Hope your Easter Sunday is filled with blessings and joy.

Hello, My Name is...and I am a...

2009-04-11T18:18:00.000-07:00

Procrastinator. I think I need a step program. Merriam-Webster's Online Dictionary defines a procrastinator like this:

to put off intentionally and habitually.

Yep, that fits. At least it fits when it comes to grad school homework. When I went to school the first time many, many years ago, I rarely did homework...okay, I rarely went to class and I barely passed. I was having way too much fun...doing other stuff. (There will be NO commenting on the other stuff from those of you who know that story...Bob.) My gpa was so poor I had to start grad school on probation...sheesh...how embarrassing! So when I started grad school I was determined to be a stellar student. Actually, I loved being back in school and was excited about papers, reading and all that...stuff. Fast forward to now. I'm almost finished. I have the class I am currently taking and two more and I am done! Done! I think I have already started celebrating. My class work is due on Sundays...I get the assignments on Friday...have a full week and two days to get it done and what do I do? I wait until the Saturday before to even start it. Of course, I am in good company. There are some of us (not naming names here, Mary)who like to wait until Sunday at 10 pm to even start. At least I give myself a little time to get it done. Usually I am working frantically on Saturday and Sunday along with my friends...who are apparently also procrastinators...which is just a nice word for slackers. What's funny is when we started our degree we (not Bob, just she who shall remain nameless) renamed most of our classmates. (yeah, yeah, not nice, judgemental, rude, we resembled all of that...whatever...it made us laugh...hard...and we never said the names in front of others) One of our classmates we named...slacker boy...cause he never, ever posted anything on time. Now we have become...slacker girls...very, very sad...and more than a little funny. I have spent most of today doing homework. For a change I have started next week's work...early!! Don't get too excited. It is doubtful I will even look at it again until...Saturday...oh wait, that's DQ's bday...hmmmm...next Sunday's gonna be a busy day!

Easter Eggs

2009-04-10T16:37:00.000-07:00

We've been really busy at our house today getting ready for Easter. We spent hours on these eggs.

NOT REALLY!

The only eggs you'll find at my house are these....the chocolate variety.

We don't dye Easter eggs. That is way too messy for me and eggs are just plain gross. My kids have dyed eggs before...with the Stepford Sister. They loved it and had a great time but they are satisfied with candy ones. They have grown accustomed to their mom's oddities.